Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got mugged by a fake hooker. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were downtown when he pointed to a girl and said he wished I dressed more like she did. She was obviously a hooker. FML
We need a break
Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML
Today, for my birthday, I found out I'm too ugly even for a hooker to have sex with me. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity. Too bad it cost me every last shred of self-respect and involved begging a hooker to take my money. FML
Soliciting
Today, I was at our hotel waiting for my husband to finish his shower so we could have our anniversary dinner, when hotel security forcefully removed me from the building because they do not allow "prostitutes" to look for clients on their property. They thought I was a hooker. FML
Sex work is real work
Today, I just found out my best friend is a hooker. I just thought she worked nights and had terrible taste in clothes. FML
Today, I had to dress like a diva for a drama performance and my friend said I looked like a hooker. Then someone said, “If hookers looked like that, they wouldn't get any money." FML
Today, I checked into a hotel because my boss had assigned me to a new position. As soon as the reception lady looked up, she had me kicked out of the hotel. Apparently, one of the regulations is, "No prostitutes allowed." I was wearing a business suit. FML
Today, I was driving back home after hanging out with some friends. I drove pass a woman standing next to a broken down car. I felt bad, so went back and offered her a ride home. Turns out it wasn't her car and she was a hooker. FML
Top comments
hailphire130 0
Give her some more money then. Bitches love money.
FMLollie 7
The way this FML is written it's so formal can you imagine how he would go up to her! "Excuse me miss, I would like to purchase your services in sexual pleasure."
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Comments (284)
JamieRae00 0
If you want pussy try to go to the mall an get a pocket pussy tgat was theres no rules no bitchin an do it a long as you want annn you dot have to worrie about dieses.!!
dmw25 0
Damn, that really sucks to be you.
mic203 2
hang thyself kid,i mean u below hooker standards?a lot of people have died for less...wait,i think this is how rapist are made.
mic203 2
hang thyself kid,i mean u below hooker standards?a lot of people have died for less...wait,i think this is how rapist are made.
VianaJ_Garcia 14
Of course she was scared of your ugliness.
bipolarbaby 0
Being turned down by a prostitute...maybe he's joey bonaducci?
jovanwife 0
well damn..FYL
eakthegeek 11
@tennisrapper1 street prostitution is illegal no matter where you are, and the closer to Reno you live in Nevada the less likely it's legal. All of the ***** houses are on the outskirts of the state because they can't legally be in city limits
CaineghisMord 2
You know your a sick sick little puppy when...
conniejoy529 10
i'm not very familiar with prostitutes but i can only imagine that you said or did or wanted her to do something terrible. If someone is desperate enough to prostitute themselves i highly doubt they would turn down a customer based on appearances. If they were that selective they probably wouldn't get much business. If you go by the assumption that most good looking guys don't need to pay for sex, then you would think that a large part of their clientele would be in say way considered unattractive.