Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. I also found out from her husband that she has her nipples and nether regions pierced. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my mom and her friends comparing the differences in their nipples. FML
Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML
Today, I got a nipple piercing. My girlfriend thought I was pranking her with a fake piercing, because I wouldn’t be "daft enough" to get a real one, and she yanked it off, or rather through, my nipple. Yes, it cut my poor nip in half, and I now have two nipples where once I had only one. FML
Today, while playing with my cat, she decided to give me a surprise nipple piercing with her claws. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my mom. The first thing my mom did was look at her breasts and mention that no matter what happens, hers were the first that I suckled on. FML
Today, I flew home to visit my parents. We haven't seen each other in two years, I've gotten a few tattoos done since, and I knew they wouldn't approve, so I bought whole new outfits that covered everything and looked professional. When I got there, the first thing my mom says to me is, "Is that a nose ring!?" FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML
Today, I realized the birthmark I have on my chest isn't a birthmark at all; it's a third nipple. FML
Today, my mom told me that she had great news: we were going to meet my biological parents. I didn't know I was adopted. FML
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Top comments
diet_otaku 0
this site really needs a "what's the big deal?" button.
zabeth_fml 0
OMG NOT PIERCINGS NOOOOO! ...Seriously. So what?
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Comments (108)
LuckyCharms_fml 0
And....? If your name was maybe "Embarrassed" instead of "Disgusted" I might give a shit but you kinda just sound like you're being a snob.
whatshorts 0
Exactly what I was thinking. The name erased what sympathy, if any in the first place, that I had for her.
khatuba 0
If you met your mom for the first time, and had to picture her nipples, you wouldn't be disgusted? Idiots.
diet_otaku 0
no, not really. i got over being grossed out by my parents' bodies in middle school. they're just nipples, everyone has them.
LuckyCharms_fml 0
No #35 not if you're older than 12
Buzzshock331 7
No matter what you say, we'd all be a little disgusted on meeting our mom for THE FIRST TIME and learning such intimate details. She has a right to an opinion, you guys acting like jerks doesn't help.
livelovelaugh23 0
...that's pretty cool actually.
hunny_kat 0
You used nether regions in a sentence hahhahaha what is this 20,000 leagues under the sea? FYL
kc2_fml 0
yes... yes it is
proud_liberal 0
so what if she did? you must be a conservative. I hope you die and you get cancer
Mandy_fml 0
WOW, dude, calm down. Maybe she's an ignorant snob but that doesn't mean she deserves cancer. People like you make me sick.
fxdxhk90 0
It doesn't matter, everyone on this site knows that proud liberal is a world class jackass.
Kozzy333 0
Not a big deal at all.
1234five 0
sooooooo...?
Bryan_Z 0
OMG SHE NOT TRADITIONAL DEATH SENTENCE. Chill dude.
xNephilim 19
It's not that bad, we all know that. But it's still something I wouldn't want to know about my Mom, especially if I met her the first time.
xOpheliacx 0
...Your point?
Avenging_Angel 0
"Nether regions" XD So she has a few piercings. I don't see the problem.