Today, my sister was "sexting" her boyfriend over Apple messages. Since we share an iTunes account the messages appeared on my iPod. Apparently, he shouldn't be silly, and should wrap his willy. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized all of my boyfriend's and my dirty messages were being sent to my mom because I'd logged into messenger on her phone once without logging out. She sat me down and said, "I know your mouth's been on his wee wee." FML
Today, I went onto my computer and found a cyber sex conversation between my sister and my girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend was showing me photos on his iPod when he came across a photo of a half-naked girl. He tried to play it off by quickly changing it, only to reveal even more half-naked girls. FML
Today, I was texting my boyfriend while in the car with my family. He sent a particularly racy text, and my little sister happened to look over at my phone and then asked quite loudly, "What does anal mean?” FML
Today, I found out that sharing Apple ID’s with your iPhone and your wife’s iPad is a bad idea. She might receive the texts and nude pictures between you and your side chick. FML
Today, the new Apple update put all of the 100+ nudes I'd sent my boyfriend on his mother's phone because their accounts are linked. FML
Today, I sent a text message to my girlfriend telling her how much I wanted to make love to her tonight. I've just realized I sent it to her brother. FML
Today, I got an iPhone, I was excited and because I have a new number, I wanted to mess with my girlfriend a little. I started sending her provocative messages, and after 4 or 5 of them, I discovered I had entered her number wrong and was talking dirty to a man named Noah. FML
Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML
Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
You should play with her messages...>:)
pizzaboterham 10
What did the next one say; don't be a dick, come here and lick
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Comments (120)
SkoomaKi 28
You should play with her messages...>:)
DespairFaction 11
You should send something about wanting to fart in his face or using a strap on.
iStrukk 7
if you play with a message about sex, and masturbation is a form of sex, then technically wouldnt he be playing with his sister?
unknown_user5566 27
27- No, no he wouldn't.
teddy4nyy 13
I would use it as blackmail against your dad
mylifesucks_fml 1
at least there weren't pictures! that'd be pretty messed up! or were there...?
ArcadePie 10
Remember kids cover your stump before you hump!
Cad6 24
Get ready, Uncle OP.
DespairFaction 11
Yes! Get his hopes up about having a threesome or something gross like farting in his face.
Yorih 19
Aha that'd be funny, the boyfriend would proper get confused though xD I'm gonna presume you're either paraphrasing or just describing, because if she actually said that she's terrible at sexting x)
GatherTheMice 15
Lol she makes him put on a condom for sexting...
VoteForTaco 8
102- She doesn't want to get a virus.
cyndiig 2
I now wonder if people who share my ITunes account can read my messages
LadyGore 12
Black mail her with them >=D
ThisBiatchFMLs 5
depends how old her sister is lol :P
Dr0reos 8
OP, well she's right he should.
pizzaboterham 10
What did the next one say; don't be a dick, come here and lick
Mr_Que_Dijo23 5
Haha I'm sorry this just made my morning:D can't stop laughin haha
JessicaNB 2
Your sister got it all wrong. She should have said ”don't be a fool, wrap your tool!” Everyone knows that saying is much better!
ydi_4_suking 20
I like the one that goes. Don't be a dummy, cum on her tummy.
zachherbert 10
Don't be a dummy, cum on my tummy! Edit: well damn, seems like I was beat by less than a minute.
miserableatbest2 12
No glove, no love.
ForeverAloneGal 23
Don't be whack. **** on her back.
ElmoSaysSquishy 28
Wear some latex so you don't get that "I'm late" text.
laden_swallow09 35
19 - Pull-out method alone doesn't work. Even if you have the patience and mental discipline of a Xaolin monk, precum still has some **** in it. Doesn't take much of it to conceive.
Senseless_487 29
Aaaaand Buzz Killington makes an appearance!
sirpantselot 22
If it's not on, it's not on!
Nukorav 2
Before you hump, wrap your stump.
MrsBruceWayne6 3
Cage your snake then shake and bake!
shots1996 8
Wear that latex so you don't get that late text sayin "I'm late" text
l23VIVE 17
Only a moron wouldn't wrap his hard-on Wait Deja Vu, this seems vaguely familiar as if this same type if thread was on another FML
freakinglaugher 10
^ Dude, there is a couple dozen threads filled with condom rhymes. Each jizzyer than the last.
ThatOneGirl0101 11
No no no. Don't give her an infection with your affection put some protection on that erection
calmyourself 7
Safety first
Objectofdespair 1
Totally you should mess with them
zachherbert 10
Totally dude. Like, totally mess with them.
yoursucklives 36
well don't you think he should wear protection? anyway, i understand that you don't want to know about your sisters sexlife!
jozmejia 13
No glove, no love :)
theoriok 14
Hey you don't be silly put a condom on your willy yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah -Def Dames Dope
DoubleCross 9
Wrap it before you tap it.