Today, I bought a new beanbag chair. My cat thought it was a great scratcher and I now have thousands of tiny plastic balls around the house. He decided those looked yummy, and now the scent of vomit and plastic is awful. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new couch was delivered. As the delivery guys left, I came back into the living room and noticed a bad but familiar smell. I turned the couch cushions over to discover that my cat had already claimed it as her personal litter tray. The return policy doesn’t cover "cat defilement." FML
Today, I awoke to my cat with micro pellets all over him. He'd destroyed a pillow containing them, and now there are thousands of these pellets throughout the entire house. My vacuum is broken. FML
Today, I bought my cat a nice big bag of expensive anti-hairball catfood, so she'd stop puking hairballs on my things. After eating it, she started running around wildly, howling and projectile vomiting on EVERYTHING. FML
Today, after getting home from my morning run, I found my brand new leather couch with scratches all over it and smelling of cat piss. I don't have a cat. FML
Today, my cat used his expensive new bed for the first time since he got it last month. He used it as a litter box. FML
Today, our rodent problem was taken care of. I discovered this when my cat projectile-vomited a soggy, death-scented wad of dark fur and tiny organs onto the couch. FML
Today, my husband thought it was the best idea ever to clean the cat's litter box with the brand new vacuum cleaner instead of tipping it into a bin bag. My house now fills with the smell of warm cat piss every time I hoover. FML
Today, my cat is extremely sick and has trouble grooming himself. As evidenced by his butt. He laid on me for a while and it wasn't until a few minutes after he got off that I realized he had stained my pants. That also explains why my chair suddenly looks so nasty, and why my room smells horrible. FML
Today, I got my cat stuffed after her death. I brought her home and set her down by my couch. I guess my dog thought it was a new chew toy. FML
Today, I got my cats a new scratching post. They completely ignored it and tore apart the new felt on my pool table. FML
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Top comments
Witchylady 18
Cats are the best.
fsomelife 26
Take him to the vet and clean everything.
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Comments (48)
Witchylady 18
Cats are the best.
BigLatchZatch 14
And by that we mean the worst.
MortenM 17
I just don't get why plastic smells after a trip halfway through a cat & back. Maybe OP would elaborate of how the otherwise odeurless plastic smells like. Besides vomit of course.
DoubleDosexo 12
it smells almost as bad as it does if you burn it.
fsomelife 26
Take him to the vet and clean everything.
ShadowlessSpear 21
Seems a bit obvious, no?
noah_1234 24
mabye the vet seems like something new to someone who has never had a pet before
pinkchocoa 15
Don't they say keep it away from cats on the tag ?
pipipiyo 12
Maybe you'll be able to buy another one now since hopefully your cat will have learned its lesson.. Or maybe not.
HersheySquirts 17
Possibly twice the amount of puke and little balls as well...
badluckalex 23
that would be the definition of insane..
Bibliovore 26
I don't know why people are downvoting #9. It's from a quote that's often misattributed to Einstein, and clearly applies: "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
bombielol 20
poor kitty cat Dx
Alicestraza 33
I feel worse for the cat throwing up than I do for your beanbag :(
ElizabethHerrera 5
Well my cat cat decided to pee and vomit up in my bean bag chair
lysx84 24
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI we are no longer in the 90's - there's no excuse for having a beanbag chair.
slyde32 12
except that bean bag chairs are awesome
Daniel589 7
Yeah #10 that comment wasn't really needed
catanita 18
Use the vacuum cleaner if you want to clean fast. If you want slow use a tweezer.
Sandsh8rk 36
You'll be hanging out with a vacuum cleaner and some Febreeze for a while.
Bibliovore 26
Not Febreeze -- Nature's Miracle, or Fizzion.