Today, I called the cops on my elderly neighbor for blaring loud war music yet again. They chatted and laughed with him on his lawn for a good half hour. As they left, he slapped the female officer's ass, only for her to just giggle about it. After they drove off, he fired up his music again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my elderly neighbour was having some kind of house party. It was incredibly loud, so I went and asked if he could tone it down a little. He responded by grabbing a deck chair, smacking me with it, then chasing me back to my house, all while his guests cheered him on. FML
Today, I've suffered 3 months of my neighbor blasting his music so loud, it shakes my apartment floor. None of my noise complaints are ever followed up, but the moment I give him a piece of my mind, he calls the cops, and they threaten me with jail time over a few curse words. FML
Today, I finally got tired of my neighbors constantly blaring their obnoxious rap music all hours of the day and night. Trying to be funny, I put Baby Shark on a loop and turned my speakers all the way up. They called the cops on me. FML
Today, we have an asshole neighbor who owns a loud muscle car. Another neighbor called the cops on him for constantly revving the engine and breaking the noise ordinance. He now purposefully drives by their house at odd hours of the night to blare his horn and wake everybody up. I live across the road from them. FML
Today, my neighbor installed a large radio that loudly plays Christmas music 24/7. When I called in a complaint to the police department they told me to, "get in the Christmas spirit." FML
Today, my grandpa was visiting. My neighbors started blasting out rap music, as they've done nearly 24/7 for months, telling me to fuck off when I complain. He went over and screamed he'd gut them like fish if they didn't pipe down. They did. He's 68 and still more intimidating than me. FML
Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML
Today, I mistook my neighbor’s karaoke party for a heated argument and called the cops. When they arrived, everyone was in the middle of a dramatic rendition of Bohemian Rhapsody. FML
Today, my neighbor yelled “Fuck you!” at me through his window. My crime? Closing my front door “too loud.” This man lets his children beat on the walls and slam doors but apparently I’m the problem. FML
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Top comments
dontmindme7 9
Try being more like him
dno79 19
old dude sounds like he still got game! sorry you have to deal with him
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Comments (91)
GuyOnBridge 14
so this is the police force, letting old men slap officers ass's.
HollyQuinn 21
That's disgusting, the old twat would have a broken hand if he slapped my butt. Complain to the police department!
ned diggers 14
You probably wish a veteran slapped your arse.
sk8erd 15
slapping a cops ass? and getting away with it? the dude has guts...
messymessiah 11
This sounds like something out of a movie
Bragi 12
Old man's got game.
sh4ll0truth88 8
What did she look like???
TheBadAndGnarly 19
All I can picture is OP's neighbour playing Rise of the Valkyries on a continuous loop
elcee1987 18
That's what I'm picturing as well.
Elban 20
Calling and complaining to the cops about something like this really isn't going to accomplish much. Doing it repeatedly and going to higher ups is more likely to just have you labeled a crybaby or something similar. The cops came out, told him to turn it down and left again, same thing is more than likely going to happen next time. Sure it sucks but if it's something minor, it's like dealing with a sibling, your parents, the cops, get tired of hearing it too. Talk to the guy or just deal with it is how it's going to end up getting fixed.
Sathane 21
That man is a ******* legend. Take notes and beg him to teach you his ways.
HoboMeth 36
Get a better sound system than his, blast it, then it's music war