Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML
Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML
Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4 a.m. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML
Today, after 3 days of hearing a car alarm going off almost continuously, the city finally came and towed it. Immediately after, the owner showed up with a switchblade, inquiring who called the city. My neighbors ratted me out, despite the fact I had nothing to do with it. FML
Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML
Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML
Today, I woke up at 6:00 am to the sound of somebody laying on their horn outside my apartment. I ran outside to yell at them only to find out it was my car. The horn was shortcircuting. All my neighbors stood on their porch laughing as I repeatedly punched my steering wheel to make it stop. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML
Today, I heard my downstairs neighbor being beaten by her husband. I anonymously called 911, hoping to help. She must've seen me giving the cops my statement because as soon as they left, she knocked on my door and punched me square in the face while screaming, "Mind your own business bitch!" FML
Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML
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Top comments
writerchic85 26
Take video of them doing it and call the cops again.
SoulEaterSE 23
Now call the cops on them for damaging your property
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Comments (42)
writerchic85 26
Take video of them doing it and call the cops again.
UnicornWaffles 23
Considering them having a baseball bat and a quite obviously obnoxious attitude, that doesn't seem like the best idea.
aleyp63 13
36, dont you know the meaning of hidden cameras?
mcsammo11 12
they don't seem to be smart neighbors.
gogo44444 28
Is this century, who is?
JustinJK 21
^Not you.
SoulEaterSE 23
Now call the cops on them for damaging your property
Silk_Routes 14
living with nuts
izntdan 14
That's actually a higher charge. That's retaliation. I wold definitely call the cops and press charges.
MrsPegg 45
They're just batshit crazy OP. I'd slam some charges on them for their foul behavior if I were you.
juicy_extasy 25
Wow! Sounds like you meed to move! Would have been good if you caught that on tape so you can press charges
Mightytall 35
Are they regulars on Jerry Springer? At least they didn't come charging your front door with a 12 gage shotgun...
Mightytall 35
Come to think of it, you should probably keep one of those 12 gage shotguns near your bed from now on...
rainbowsRlove 15
absolutely video what is going on let him finish his rage fit. then press charges. easy.
moodyreallyrocks 27
You're a good neighbor OP!!