Today, I got kneed in the stomach by a sixth grader. I couldn't breathe. I have a black belt in Taekwondo. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. Five seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the Hacky Sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML
Today, I was doing a demonstration in front of my taekwondo class because I'm flexible. Really flexible. I kneed myself in the face and broke my nose. FML
Today, I was wrestling in a tournament. I was in the finals about to win when the kid threw up on me. They thought I'd hit him in the stomach hard enough to make him throw up, so they disqualified me. FML
Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML
Today, I found out that my mom withdrew me from karate at the insistence of my my fucking stepdad, who's a wimpy sissy pacifist who is against violence. I was so close to getting my black belt. FML
Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML
Today, I was in school when I got up to ask the teacher a question. For no reason, the guy sitting next to me punched me in the gut so hard I collapsed and saw stars. The teacher simply rolled her eyes and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at Tae kwon do practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear." He did this in front of all my classmates. FML
Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML
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Top comments
ihasbrains 10
At least it wasn't your balls
omfgTACOsYeSs 0
Watch Kung Fu Panda 2, that shit teaches the best moves.
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Comments (303)
Captain_Obvious2_fml 6
how does that prevent you from getting hit. it would hurt no matter what. unless you are chuck norris.
ihasbrains 10
Chuck Norris's stomach would shatter that kid's knee.
Anna173 0
Win! ^^^
mitri_fml 3
fail ^^^
KiddNYC1O 22
Chuck Norris now uses a walker...
itsmeyippie 0
chuck Norris outran a cheetah in a triathlon, round house kicked jackie chan into space, and saved 15% on car insurance in less than a minute
itsmeyippie 0
even if he is 70
ibedestinie 0
maybe they have two black belts!!
lobojojo 1
your a fool!!
ihasbrains 10
You're* Try calling them a fool again.
columbian_kush 0
kinda lame.....nice boobs though
omg_a_BALLOON 0
Why did you guys give him so many thumbs down?? You can have a black belt in two martial arts.
Bano360 25
I have a blackbelt in Karate and Tae Kwon Do.
Genesis215 1
110- Him? I believe the user that was thumbed down is a girl.
Nikki_ASW 0
189: No I'm pretty sure that's a guy.
buiscit 0
so how's you training coming by the sound of it not good?!??!
iAmScrubs 19
It isn't OP's fault. He thought that he was learning a martial art everyday when he woke up at 6:00AM to do Tai Chi while watching breakfast television.
Truth_Nazi 0
And that's why I pack an airsoft gun at all times >:)
spider63 0
oh ur hardcore bro I hope I don't run into you on the streets
fatazzkid 0
ahahagaha ^^
benjimm1 0
ur the reason airsoft is illegal in California soon. just carry a switchblade like everyone else
Truth_Nazi 0
I have never used it, I just have it to scare people. Even if I don't have it, I just kick the person's ass.
spider63 0
I think we hurt his feelings
Truth_Nazi 0
Oh please, As if anything someone says on the Internet matters to me
cummbubble 0
i knew taekwondo didnt teach you shit
Eggers 2
it's just a sport, it's not for self defense. the sooner idiots like the op figures this out, the better.
james3458 3
seriously. I had two years of it and I really didn't learn anything that useful in the outside world so I quit.
stigster13 2
I've been doing it for 3 and a half years and I'm also a black belt but still a knee t the stomach is gona hurt. I can kick you in the head, doesn't mean I don't feel pain
Byah 2
Getting kneed in the stomach knocks the breath out of you no matter what color belt you have, lol. And being a black belt in TKD doesn't automatically make you an ultra warrior. Don't sweat it.
wackywillie54 0
exactly but I am a second degree and almost third degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do and in sparring you have to learn to take hits so he must not spar
Wastelander 4
Were you, by any chance, on the 2-year blackbelt plan or the 3-year blackbelt plan? The 3-year costs a little more but has the added benefit of learning to kind of know how to take a hit. Or you can stop going to a belt factory. Your choice :P
freerun4life97 0
Wtf? 2 year plan? 3 year plan?
tona01 16
joke...
freerun4life97 0
oh...whoops...xD
Wastelander 4
Thanks for clearing that up for him :P
freerun4life97 0
for me?
mimerino 9
Yes, numbnuts.
frozenfreeze 5
Get some friends and team up on him tomorrow. Teach that punk a lesson!
HugoBosss_fml 0
Lol that's why TKD sucks!
wackywillie54 0
lol that's why you're a dick. TKD can't prepare you to get kneed in the dick
HugoBosss_fml 0
Actually I used to do TKD and he got kneed in the stomach..
hahopps 4
wow