Today, I got kneed in the stomach by a sixth grader. I couldn't breathe. I have a black belt in Taekwondo. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. Five seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the Hacky Sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML
Today, I was doing a demonstration in front of my taekwondo class because I'm flexible. Really flexible. I kneed myself in the face and broke my nose. FML
Today, I was wrestling in a tournament. I was in the finals about to win when the kid threw up on me. They thought I'd hit him in the stomach hard enough to make him throw up, so they disqualified me. FML
Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML
Today, I found out that my mom withdrew me from karate at the insistence of my my fucking stepdad, who's a wimpy sissy pacifist who is against violence. I was so close to getting my black belt. FML
Today, I argued with a boy from school over a girl. I didn't know he was a black belt judoka. I'm still in pain. FML
Today, I was in school when I got up to ask the teacher a question. For no reason, the guy sitting next to me punched me in the gut so hard I collapsed and saw stars. The teacher simply rolled her eyes and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I came down with sudden diarrhea while at Tae kwon do practice. I discreetly called my dad for a pickup, but on our way out, he told my instructor that I had to go because I was "shitting my pants with fear." He did this in front of all my classmates. FML
Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ihasbrains 10
At least it wasn't your balls
omfgTACOsYeSs 0
Watch Kung Fu Panda 2, that shit teaches the best moves.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (303)
XxA7XKillerxX 1
You can't even spell your own profession right... :|
steveakafranxy 7
we know how to spell it, but how do YOU spell it
Clover2009 0
LOL fail. They did spell it right.
Xmarshall16X 5
Taekwondo, however you spell it, isn't a profession unless you are an instructor...you pay to learn, you don't GET paid to.
sheethapins 13
Having a black belt in anything doesn't keep you from feeling pain.
Prankster7o7 5
Oooh, black belt in Tae-Kwon-Do, maybe if you took an actual martial art that you could use in a real fight, maybe you'd know about this little thing called the solar plexus! You get hit there and you get the wind knocked out of you.
sheethapins 13
Tae-Kwan-Do? How about Tae-Kwan-DON'T! Hahaha haha... ha... What? Nothing? Screw you guys... *walk of shame*
Phase 0
Your solar plexus is in your chest, he got hit in the stomach. Idiot.
Prankster7o7 5
Actually, no dipshit, it's located in your abdomen. Why do you think core conditioning is so important in martial arts? Learn your shit before you try to argue.
hook_em 0
Ohhhh noooo. some one must not have been training much. you should get back to that right away so you can beat up that sixth grader ooooooo.
22Marie22 0
Your sensei should be very disappointed in you.
FMLsOhilarious 6
haha that must've been one mean sixth grader.
Shlizabeth 0
Totally unrelated... Being a black belt doesn't make you invincible and immune to pain.
emoverlord 0
taekwando is shit-karate.
2riteluvonherarm 0
you weren't ready... duh.
Xmarshall16X 5
You can be the best fighter on earth if theres a 12 year old your not expecting them to knee you most likely. It doesn't make you weak you just were caught off guard. Personally I have a black belt but I got it before I was even ten, and i can't really remember anything about Taekwondo haha.