Today, I noticed my new neighbor had taken the liberty of putting up signs all around their lawn overnight. There are at least a dozen signs detailing the various reasons everyone on the planet is condemned to hell. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new neighbor just put up really loud wind chimes. I just got a ton of letters under my door, stating if I don't take them down, they're going to file a noise complaint with the building management. She owns her condo, I don't. FML
Today, my husband is very liberal. Normally this is a good thing, but the people across the street have put out a TRUMP sign and he's gone nuts. He built a massive HARRIS/WALZ sign in our front yard and is hassling the rest of the neighborhood about it. Half of them are putting out TRUMP signs out of spite. FML
Today, I discovered that my neighbors had held a secret "meeting" to discuss how annoying my "constant singing" as I go about my days in my apartment. They even made a petition, with over ten signatures, asking me to "cease and desist." FML
Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
Today, I was woken up by the police pounding on my door, saying I was under arrest for stealing road signs. My friends went drinking last night and thought it would be funny to steal seven stop signs, four bus stop signs, and two children crossing signs, then plant them on my front lawn. FML
Today, it's been 3 days since I moved into my new house. I'm already known as the neighborhood racist, after some dicksplash thought it'd be funny to tape a sign to my door overnight that said: "DO NOT RING IF YOU ARE A NEGRO AND/OR JEW." FML
Today, at WalMart, I saw a guy taping a sign that read "Hide and seek world champs!" over the lost children board. I chased him out of the store, then came back to take it down. As I was trying to remove the sign, a huge crowd began cursing at me and threatening me. They thought I'd made the sign. FML
Today, I met my new neighbors. The first thing they did was build a fence. FML
Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML
Today, I got home from work to find my house covered in graffiti dicks, the windows smashed, the front lawn entirely ripped up, and my letter box containing dog shit. I also found a note taped to the door saying, "Suck on this Darren". Darren is my next door neighbor. FML
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Top comments
HSOMGF 5
Tell them to move to Kansas and join the WBC.
MrDiezel 3
What does this have to do with you
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Comments (117)
Quasar55_fml 18
What reasons for example ? Because If I'm going to hell, I would like to know why :-)
Doortje 30
Make her life a living hell.
OCDC 9
Give them a little taste of where they're going ;)
zombiedroogie138 0
how does this involve your life being ******?
NuyoRicanGirl 3
you've got some ****** up crazy ass neighbors FYL
asbmf 7
The key words here are "their house." Your neighbors can do whatever they want on their own property as long as it's not illegal, which this isn't. It's not your house, and it has nothing to do with you, so as long as you don't just sit there all day staring at your neighbor's yard, this shouldn't really affect you at all.
miss_la_rue 6
Actually, most neighborhoods have laws involving what can and cannot be displayed on someone's property. OP, you should definitely see if any of those rules exist in your neighborhood and then make sure they get fined.
iwadasn 33
It's just like when people put signs up showing their support for a political candidate. Some people may disagree with them, but that doesn't mean they have to take the signs down.
KevinTheDead 0
you can say you find it offensive.
Pluff 0
83, no, but it is offensive to have a sign saying "All Repulicans are evil" on your yard. The signs displayed on OP's neighbors lawn is basicly telling her she's going to hell. There's a difference between having "All hail Satan" as a sign than having "We're all going to hell because every single human is evil and should be punished. Further more, OP said they listed reasons, which means they're probably insulting a vast majority who take part in said reasons (ex: sex before marriage) and trying to make them feel crapy.
BonJovi821 3
Correct me if I'm wrong but I remember hearing a story (I believe this happened in Florida) about a man who was fined a substantial amount of money for putting an American flag in his yard. Now if THAT's something to be fined for, surely a dozen signs telling you to go to Hell are too.
NuyoRicanGirl 3
you've got some ****** up crazy ass neighbors FYL
sexihazy 0
Not really an fml for u
Iknoweverything 29
So post signs on your yard detailing everything Jesus said about hypocrisy. Start with Matthew 7: Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Jesus pissed people off by calling them hypocrites you know. Might as well fight bibles with bibles. (P.S. to the future biblical arguments... you can prove almost ANYTHING with the bible if you're dealing with someone who doesn't read the whole thing, and has blind faith.)
Dragons_corner 6
lol 2 churches did that and the signs were very funny. I say op go with it. Bible fight.
alex1432 9
freedom of speech
AsianCookie247 14
agreed 28, agreed.
OCDC 9
*Freedom of expression
DocBastard 40
You should invite them over for tea, biscuits, and some candid conversation about the merits of Satanism.
newfiegirl 8
your an idiot..
Hidan_fml 0
^ The irony is killing me...
Hidan_fml 0
Wait, why did my comment get deleted? I was just pointing out the irony of this post.
zoraman5 3
it didn't, don't worry :3 and I see the ironic point ;D
testthecoal 5
nefie, I don't know about doc or anyone else, but my taste does not revolve around unborn baby photos.
jess6blondie9 3
If you're taste doesn't include unborn babie pictures, don't look at her picture! Why is everyone such douche's about her pregnant picture? Newfie, don't listen to them. Your a mom to be, and you're baby bump is beautiful. Congratulations and don't let them bring you down! :)
talb1 7
Jess I don't usually correct people, but I'm going to be a dick today. So it's "you're a mom to be, and your baby bump is beautiful" You're = you are
DocBastard 40
Newfie, can you please explain WHY I'm an idiot? If you're going to call someone out, you need to have a reason. Please explain, but use very small words because I'm probably just too stupid to understand the long, multisyllabic ones like "multisyllabic". I eagerly await your scintillating reply.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Awe, don't bet your last dollar, Doc. She probably doesn't even understand what the word "idiot" means... she clearly used it wrongly the first time.
Nychthemeron 2
Hey, 70, shall I just not look at anything for fear I might not like it? Boy, I sure wish I followed your advice before looking at your picture. Moronic blondes are /so/ not my thing.