Theaccident 22 January 2011, 10:03 Australia 🌶️ Spicy

The truth

Today, my mum told me how I was only here because my dad couldn't pull out in time. FML

118 comments

Collection

Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Same thing different taste

Anonymous 9 November 2011, 12:55 Australia 🌶️ Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

191 comments

unfortunate This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff United States

The truth

Today, my father informed me that I was born only because my mom lied about being on birth control. FML

100 comments

crakbbyaparently 31 January 2009, 01:34 United States

Today, my old man told me that he only married my mom because she convinced him she was pregnant with his child. In fact, she aborted a week later. "And then we had you instead." FML

21 comments

wtfdad 16 November 2014, 05:29 Little Silver, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

78 comments

-.- 19 January 2015, 01:18 Ellwood City, United States 🌶️ Spicy

Stop talking

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

50 comments

Anonymous 17 January 2016, 07:26 Blair, United States

Today, I found out that the only reason I'm alive is because my dad beat the living shit out of my mom to stop her getting an abortion. FML

155 comments

Anonymous 16 February 2011, 05:50 🌶️ Spicy

Don't wanna know

Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

88 comments

Anonymous 9 November 2020, 17:02 India 🌶️ Spicy

Knock next time please

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML

6 comments

LuckySperm 12 August 2011, 13:14 United Kingdom

Today, my dad told me that after my two older siblings were born, he got a vasectomy. However, something went wrong, and the vasectomy had failed, resulting in me. FML

215 comments

Anonymous 25 March 2023, 02:00 Pakistan 🌶️ Spicy

Third on the podium

Today, my parents told me that they had planned two kids (my older siblings) and I was born because my father "thought" that he was wearing a condom. FML

3 comments

sourgirl101 29

22 January 2011, 17:02

Many children are unexpected but what is unexpected and unacceptable is for a mother to say such things. What child wants to hear that the "only" reason they are here is because daddy forgot to pull out? It may be true but not something a loving mother should ever say to their child. Ever!