Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML
Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
Today, after asking my hubby for what seems the millionth time to stop shoving his finger into my bum crack, I thought it would be funny to give him a taste of his own medicine by doing it to him. Right as my finger was in his crack, he let loose a huge fart. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML
Today, my husband farted while he was naked and bending over to pick up his clothes, so me lying on the bed got a perfect view of his butthole twitching and flapping around as the gas escaped. Who says romance is dead? FML
Today, my husband farted, grabbed a fan and blew the smell right at me. Disgusted, I reminded him that I’m a lady, not a dude. He burst out laughing and sang, "Dude looks like a lady." FML
Today, while spooning my spouse, I was awakened in the wee hours by a huge, junk-rattling fart. This has happened numerous times since she became a vegetarian. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML
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Top comments
Xquisite1 28
Yep and...YOU married him.
LadyGore 12
Now you need to come up with a way to get him back even grosser. Make him regret doing it and see the humor in it, not the disgust. :P
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Comments (111)
eblondie2838 9
uu
perdix 31
What an *lowers sunglasses* asshole! No, seriously, he might have problems controlling his anus -- you may want to go see a sphincterologist to have that looked at.
davemich53 4
Hey, you married him !!!!!
irishsavior21 3
That's my wife. Every night F.our.L
amiewithaj 13
queef on him. Perfect revenge
Ray_of_midnight 23
Eat a cabbage and broccoli omelet and then give him a Dutch oven.
neurodoc 1
Asparagus baby
cuteygrlblackey 1
Seriously your husband is kind of a pig but I guess most guys have their moments. If I were you I would just get even, it might even be fun :)
Haskins54 4
Better out than in
mmiller93 3
My husband thinks its funny to catch his farts in his hand and throw it in my face! At least yours hasn't gone that far, YET! Lol at least he's comfortable around you though!
strawberryspacejam 11
do it to him to even the odd