Today, my grandmother told me she would pay for me to get a nose job. I never thought there was a problem with my nose. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my parents told me they'd be willing to pay for me to get a nose job. I asked them what was wrong with my nose, and they said nothing, it's just not the kind of nose they'd prefer to feature in our Christmas photos. FML
Today, my perfectly sane and healthy 90 year old grandmother had a heart to heart with me. She told me she'd pay for a boob job. When I asked why, she said, "Sweetie, you'll never attract someone with those tiny suckers." FML
Today, a lady told me that I should sue whoever screwed up my "nose job" so badly. This is the nose I was born with. FML
Today, my boyfriend called and told me he had a surprise for me and to meet up with him to find out. The big surprise was a consultation with a plastic surgeon for rhinoplasty surgery. I never disliked my nose. FML
Today, I came home to tell my parents about my new nose job I got about a month ago. My mom always told me I should get one, so I didn't tell her right away to see if she would notice. I was home for about 20 minutes before she asked me, "So when are you getting that nose job?" FML
Today, I took my grandma to the hospital to visit her estranged husband who she hasn't seen in years. After a thoroughly disasterous visit, we're waiting in the carpark and my gran strokes my face and tells me I have a lot of facial hair. I thought she was going to thank me. And I'm a girl. FML
Today, I was finally having a conversation with my granny, who I don't get to see often. First thing she tells me was that she was going to have surgery soon, because her "women's insides" were "dangling out." FML
Today, I asked my grandmother to hem my prom dress for me. I'm her oldest granddaughter so I thought she'd be happy to do it. She said no. Her occupation is a seamstress. FML
Today, I got a haircut. During dinner, my grandmother complained about it, and said I looked terrible. I've had the exact same haircut for years. FML
Today, my grandma saw me putting some mints in my mouth when she walked by my room. Instead of confronting me, she told my dad I was doing drugs. FML
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Top comments
PhillyFox 0
If you didn't think there's a problem with your nose, then why are you so bothered? All that matters is if YOU think it looks fine.
jordonisawesome 0
At least she's willing. I say go for it OP.
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Comments (114)
dr_horrible 0
Same happened with my dad ... just ignore her.
PincheEdgarr 0
thanks:D
xerikax3 0
Maybe she was mistaken and somehow she got the idea you wanted one ?
Janedoe6 0
#15 is hottttt
CJFeagins 0
Lol tell her you'd pay her to go on a diet lmfao, Fyl.
adorkable_spazz 0
lol i agree. you are hott
somanyzombies 4
sounds like somthing my grandma would of said.
roro_m 0
it sucks when someone asks u to change a major thing in ur look when u thought it was perfectly fine..she is old though..i bet tht if u just told her u did it she wont even notice u actually didnt:D:D
shaniqualee 2
Ok, well seeing as your grandma's a bitch, here's what you need to do. Walk in and say, "Awww that's so sweet Grandma, but I think there's someone else who could use a nose job way more." Then, pick up the closest heavy object and slam it in your grandma's face. As she stumbles around screaming, do a back flip kick, once again, into her face. As she writhes on the floor, screaming mercy, stand over her with a salt shaker and douse it all over her face. Then, you lean in close, gently wiping away the tears and blood in her eyes and say, "As I was saying, I think someone else needs a nose job...you." And then punch in her in the face. Finally, turn around and walk out the door, putting on your sunglasses, with the song "Big Pimpin'" playing in the background.
janelly16 7
haha oh grandmas these days
codymaxey033 0
Well if you see nothing wrong with your nose than F*** your grandmother. It's called self-confidence
Granddragon 0
you just told the OP to **** their grandmother. creative solution but I'm not sure it helps with the nose thing. then they'd just be a granny-****** with a funny nose.