Today, I surprised my girlfriend by sending her an Edible Arrangement. When she called to tell me she had gotten it, she was more excited about the cute boy who'd delivered it than she was about the fruit bouquet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I received gorgeous orchids from my long distance boyfriend. I was excited about it and told my parents. They still are convinced I have no boyfriend and I mailed the flowers to myself. FML
Today, I sent the girl I like flowers, only to have her later post a picture of them online, saying, "Ha! When losers send you flowers." FML
Today, I brought my girlfriend flowers. All she managed to do was to say, "It’s been a year since you brought me flowers." FML
Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML
Today, an Edible Arrangements driver knocked on my door with the most delicious-looking gift! He was just asking for directions. FML
Today, I got a package in the mail from my girlfriend. I was really excited until I realized that it was just a box full things that I gave to her. FML
Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML
Today, I bought the girl I like a bouquet of roses saying "Anonymous" on it, and left it on her front porch. She saw it, and called the guy she thought it was from. He said, "You're welcome!" and now they're going out. FML
Today, my boyfriend treated me to a surprise romantic dinner, got me a huge balloon bouquet, a dozen roses, and a beautiful card for my birthday. Too bad it's his ex's birthday and not mine. FML
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Top comments
Thassodar 0
YDI for getting a company that has cuter delivery guys than you. That's the only possible explanation for someone putting YDI. FYL.
gvschmidt94 0
Sound's like something my ex would do. But this OFFICIALLY allows you to check out other girls :D If she bitches, remind her of this.
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Comments (121)
thepunisher_fml 0
hands down i agree with #9 hahaha so check out a girl in front of her next time and let her know how it feels
Macarooni 0
Damn thats low... Talk to her just to see how she feels about the relationship. If it seems like its going downhill even slightly, dump her ass. Maybe you can get some breakup sex out of it. >;) Oh that is horrible... Shame on me... Oh, and by the way: you do sound like a pretty cool guy. She doesnt know what shes losing.
coopcas 0
She could just eat him up.
slayerrrr 0
to all those saying YDI to the OP for buying a rubbish gift: what the hell? i say the biggest FML here is any poor sod that has to wind up being with one of you lot. "my boyfriend bought me a present today, and it cost a lot of money but it was a really crappy gift and now i'm all insulted because i wanted a pair of diamond shoes." do you have ANY idea how shallow you sound when you say stuff like that? man, some day someone will give you the gift of syphilis or AIDS or something. then you will know what an FML gift is.
Sarah_Scissors 0
at least it wasnt something else edible...that could have been a lot more awkward
Beeebop 0
She must think you're the best boyfriend ever. Delivering such delights to her door.
catatonicsleep 17
I googled, because I wasn't sure what they were and, wow I want one! Seriously that is a wonderful gift. Seems lots of guys round here have unappreciative girlfriends. That's not how we all are, promise.
gavin751 0
omg ive bought one of them b4! such a waste of money! its just fruit! Next time just buy her an apple ;p
driscoll1985 0
This is typical of my ex. The reason it is my ex. I can understand checking other birds / guys out. Its great to be out with ur mates see someone hot and each of you comment on how much you would like to bang / smash that!!!! Why you would ring ur partner up and say this really hot guy came to the door. Soooo ****** what!!!! If the bloke was to say to his mrs every time he seen a hot chick then thats probably all he would be saying every other sentance. I mean, most people see a fair few hot chicks through out the day. Esecially you americans when its boiling and all chicks are in bikinis, rollerskating around!!!! (maybe just in the movies). If I was you, from now on, everyday just throw in that you seen a hot bird at the supermarket / at work / at the pub, basically wherever you go and see how much she likes it!!!!!!!!!!!!
amiss 2
What an insensitive bitch.