Today, after being in Europe for a month, I got home to find my door wide open and all my stuff gone. I called my dad who was supposed to be watching my house. He told me I should have had someone check on my place while I was gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home from a month long vacation to find my house absolutely trashed with a lot of valuable items missing. Burglary? Nope. My dad, who was meant to be house-sitting for me, let the neighbour's teenage son have several parties there in exchange for weed. FML
Today, after quite a long work day, I got home to find my house had been broken into. Everything but my sleeping boyfriend was gone. FML
Today, I left a note on the kitchen table saying to leave the door unlocked because I lost my key. I come home to find our house ransacked and robbed. Minutes later, I found my key. In my pocket. FML
Today, I had just gotten home after being away for 8 months. My key didn’t work on my lock and while I was messing the door a man with a child opened. My landlord gave someone my apartment while I was away. FML
Today, I woke up to my Playstation 3 and my laptop missing and window open. My dad faked a robbery to see me freak out. FML
Today, I returned from a week-long vacation. My landlord told me he had let my boyfriend in my apartment to get something. I don't have a boyfriend. Everything in my apartment is gone. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Today, I got back to my apartment from being away for the past week on Spring break. I found the locks on my apartment changed and all my things on the curb, many of them broken or stolen. I ran to the leasing office to see what had happened. Turns out it was an accounting error on their part. FML
Today, late for work, I called my dad to see if he knew where my keys were. Turns out he'd taken them on holiday with him because they have a bottle opener on them. FML
Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML
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Top comments
joooeee 3
17, thanks for the info. I'll be stopping by tomorrow.
ambowew 7
Shame your father wasn't home when the burglars came calling, then they might have stolen him too, if you were lucky.
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Comments (94)
rawrkittehpwnage 0
derp
muhaidib 2
in Canada I leave the front door unlocked all day long.. no one ever comes in.. differences between USA/CAN
joooeee 3
17, thanks for the info. I'll be stopping by tomorrow.
ijrnelson 0
gotta love a bit of "my nation is better than yooouuurss :p"
dre_bro11 12
yea, well in Australia.....
kyanisaurus 0
in Japan we invite burglars in for a cup of tea and some sushi
CitrusGirl 0
In Minnesota we don't need security. We have snow. Try breaking in when there's a 5 foot snow drift in front of the door. That's right. You can't.
PurpleRae420 0
Your dads either an IDIOT or an ASSHOLE well BOTH!!!
UtterCatastrophe 4
In Oklahoma there is a bunch of crazy drunks (specially in my town) so it's usually a good idea to lock one's door :)
Justforlolz 14
In New York, you should have at least 2 locks, and a security guard is recommended.... Yea nothing special here :P
nateb1tch 1
Here in Eugene OR we leave it unlocked. nothing has ever happened
chickenfriedCG 0
in Soviet Russia house robs you
rawrinbear 0
yeah well in OHIO.....
dolphincheddar 10
69- I concur also, your my favorite number OP should have locked the door and left the house with someone reliable. also to 17 I live in canada and if I left my door unlocked I prolly wouldn't live thru the night... you must live in Nunavut or some shit
kcluna 6
In California, my chihuahua will attack anyone who breaks in!!
livin_plur 0
in California its mostly a bunch of broke teenagers who r just looking to make a few bucks so they can get there next fix most arnt really experienced so a simple lock will confuse the hell outa them
xtacticalswarmx 0
That's not true lol.
Mcnite1987 0
Lol very true
hunter989 0
Don't even get me started with vegas...
hunter989 0
Don't even get me started with vegas...
hunter989 0
Don't even get me started with vegas...
hunter989 0
Don't even get me started with vegas...
Chej 0
I live in Utah, and Mormons don't steal, only thing you have to keep your door locked for is the missionaries.
KJLD5 0
in canada, we have 10 foot dnow drifts covering up everything soo. citrus girl.
twinmum_fml 6
#69 - best comment EVER
Xylus 0
Thanks for caring, Dad! *cough*
maskedman 9
Yeah, the dad is kind of a selfish jerk. *sneeze*
ambowew 7
Now that we've all got that out of our system *dies*
maskedman 9
I'm sorry for the corniness. I just like putting whatever I'm doing at the time I'm typing in between two asterisks. *flies away*
CitrusGirl 0
Seriously, who does that anymore? I mean- *goes into cardiac arrest*
ilyfrenchiee 0
fags *cough* *sneeze* *die* *fly* *carddiac arrest* ;D
Imabigbeast 5
C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
PolBig123 0
ur dad sux :s
AZUMIKKEL 3
"should have someone checked on my place" I don't understand this part
ChantelRenaeee 0
I think OP meant "should have had someone check on my place."
Rachel_fml 20
Our mistake! I hope that helps! ;-)
ChantelRenaeee 0
explain please?
synonymous 1
"Hope that helps" meaning that she fixed the typo that got through the Mods on the final check before posting. At least that's what I got out if it. :)
ChantelRenaeee 0
I'm sorry, but your dad's an idiot.
AsianCookie247 14
agreed.
djnova11 4
that would really suck if that happened to me
Alex94xela 0
lol nice pic
MaximilianMarche 0
great pic
mandel2000 0
gone daddy gone, the love is gone..
Mirorbo 27
Time to drop someone off the family tree, it seems. It's clear he doesn't care, darling...
enonymous 9
Estate sale happening in the alley behind Walmart. cash only sale. all sales are final.
PSQ91 6
Wouldn't have prevented you from getting robbed anyway.
qwert1994 0
Your an idiot.
PSQ91 6
I know how to spell at least, idiot.
TookaWooka666 0
I actually agree, if his dad was there it would have been extemely unlikely but even if the door was locked someone could just kick it in, you would be surprised how little some people notice.