Today, after having hardly any sleep the whole weekend, I was woken up at 3:30 am by the sound of running water. I opened my eyes to find my fiancé peeing in my favorite water bottle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after I unfortunately woke up too early and too quietly at my new-ish boyfriend's place (we've been together for about a month), I walked into his bathroom to discover that he's one of those freaks who drinks his own piss every morning. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML
Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML
Today, I had a dream I was going the bathroom. I then woke up peeing, but I didn’t wet the bed yet. As I ran to the bathroom while half asleep and in the dark, I rammed into the wall. On my way back to bed, I tripped and accidentally slapped my fiancé in an effort to stop myself from falling over. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend full-on peeing into our tiny trash bin. The trash bin was basket material, so the pee was all over the floor. Once he'd finished, he went to bed, passed out and left me to clean it all up. FML
Today, I woke up at 5 a.m. to my dog jumping off of my bed. No big deal. I rolled over to the other side of the bed to fall back asleep and my face landed right in a puddle of his pee. I tasted it. FML
Today, after being on vacation for a week, my alarm sounded early in the morning. It scared me so badly I peed myself. FML
Today, at 2am, I heard a strange sound coming from the hallway. I walked over, only to discover my drunk boyfriend pissing in the closet. On my favorite shoes. FML
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Top comments
darkshadus 10
Depending on your personal preference you either need a new water bottle or fiancé
Dave_Davington 34
At least now you have a free pass to piss on something he likes. So yeah, live the dream.
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Comments (10)
darkshadus 10
Depending on your personal preference you either need a new water bottle or fiancé
Dave_Davington 34
At least now you have a free pass to piss on something he likes. So yeah, live the dream.
Glowworm56 27
Why was he peeing in your water bottle?
Petra Grote 20
Who said it was a man ? 😂
Glowworm56 27
Fiance generally refers to a man. Fiancee refers to a woman. Sometimes the terms gets mixed up though.
raven_of_azarath 35
How exactly is a woman supposed to pee in a water bottle? Peeing in a cup is hard enough.
RichardPencil 32
You mean he peed in his favorite urine bottle. That’s the law of the jungle! I hope you get a chance to pee on his paycheck!
_Hakuna_Matata_ 12
That must've been a real eye opener.
1ninjanina 7
Was he drunk?
cylon_god 4
Boy, he really wants you to stay hydrated.