Today, the police knocked on my door, saying that they needed to investigate my house for animal abuse. Apparently the neighbours called, reporting a "screeching bird in pain". I have no bird, but I have been singing quite loudly recently. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was singing while unloading my dishwasher. I heard a knock on the door and went to answer it only to find the police telling me they received noise complaints from my neighbors. I live next-door to my parents. FML
Today, I was off from school because of an extremely bad barking cough. My neighbours called the police because apparently my cough sounds like someone torturing an animal. FML
Today, there was a knock on my apartment door. It was the man from next-door, who sarcastically asked if I was alright, because he said he heard me screaming in agony. I was singing. FML
Today, I'd had enough of the annoying bird constantly singing in the shrillest bird voice possible outside of my window, so I chased it around the yard, shooing it away, as my cat sat there and watched. FML
Today, I was woken up by a bird screaming its guts out. My cat had somehow managed to catch a bird and bring it inside. My 9 a.m. morning began with trying to catch a bird in my own home. FML
Today, while I was cleaning, listening to music and sometimes singing along, I heard a knock on my front door. I turned off the music and opened the door to the police, who stated they had to investigate reports of "repeated female screams" coming from my apartment. I'm a 23 year old man. FML
Today, I was singing in the shower and my neighbor called the police because they thought I was in trouble. FML
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
Today, I was taking a poop when I heard a window in my house break. Then, I heard things dropping upstairs. I decided to stay in the bathroom, which has a lock, and called the cops. Turns out it was just a bird that was trying to get at my fish in the fish tank that I have in my room. FML
Today, I was singing in the shower, not realising the window was open. When I got out, the neighbours were at the front door, loudly arguing with my mother. They were complaining about my awful singing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
billiejoeinabox 7
Demonstrate your singing for the cops!
tacojauns 45
Just play it off cool, "Ya officer I was practicing singing for my metal band."
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (60)
Journiexo 18
Now you know not to sing around people on the bright side (:
OysterPearls 33
That's the dimmest bright side I've ever seen.
LostInTheZone11 29
Am I the only one having a flashback to the opening of Band Geeks from Spongebob?
PoisonOrchid 21
Hahaha that was the first thing I thought of lol oh the joys of parenthood!!
CurvyisCool 22
That happened to me too, only my uncle called me a dying cat.
theorangecurls 18
just sing for them!
heyithinkyourhot 12
HAHAHAHA
Aquila_Umbrae 26
Polly want a voice coach.
tony1891 22
Simon says your Voice is absolutely dreadful.
joarasmi 24
At least your not Ice JJ Fish.
msunique_me 13
You're* ;)
buckdharma 38
Good thing you weren't cooking a chicken.
ScoobieDoobiee 8
Birds are gorgeous sounding animals! So what if you sound like one.
PegLegRacing 34
Says the person that's clearly never listened to a macaw or other large bird screech incessantly for an hour or more. We aren't talking about the sweet tweet of a robin outside your window... We are talking deafening nails on a chalk board.
RandomBird 20
I also think that "screeching birds in pain" sound gorgeous.
Stellarum 8
Would you call a vulture, "a gorgeous sounding animal"? We don't know which kind of bird OP sounds like.
PegLegRacing 34
Considering they called the cops... I'd argue it's safe to assume it wasn't the rockin' robin going tweet tweet tweet.