Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML
Today, my house was broken into. Nothing was stolen, but my laptop had feces smeared all over it. FML
Today, I invited my new girlfriend over for the first time. My roommate thought it would be funny to go on a porn site on my computer and leave it up. She saw it, freaked out, slapped me, and left. FML
Today, I came home to my empty apartment. My girlfriend had left a note on the floor that said: "Took my stuff and left. Took your stuff and pawned it." FML
Today, I got home and found all my things thrown out into the yard, including the stuff from my mancave, which I spent thousands of dollars on. Apparently, my girlfriend stopped for a visit while my wife was home. I’d stupidly given her a key. Turns out my wife called out sick today. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. I recognized him. He's the guy that broke into my car and stole my backpack two weeks ago. FML
Today, I returned from a week-long vacation. My landlord told me he had let my boyfriend in my apartment to get something. I don't have a boyfriend. Everything in my apartment is gone. FML
Today, I was playfully walking back to my car with my girlfriend. My door was unlocked. I then noticed my car had stuff scattered inside. A bum had just robbed and ransacked my car. FML
Today, I walked into pawn shop and found a nice laptop which I inspected after I thought I lost mine months ago. Turns out my ex pawned it after having it at her place all this time. FML
Today, I got home to find my house trashed, my TV, PlayStation, and laptop smashed, all my clothes burning in the backyard, and all my food gone. Turns out my girlfriend did this after going through my phone and finding a contact named "Kristi". Kristi is my sister. FML
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Top comments
orphanclubber 8
That must've been a little awkward... hope you broke up with her OP
MDoremis 38
I hope you kick that kleptomaniac to the curb.
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Comments (87)
SaltyC 10
Classic moment of "oh I forgot to tell you I borrowed that"
beararm 11
she aimed for ur heart settled for ur laptop
byornbyork 8
Not only is that a felony, but it's a representation of her lack of morals and disrespect for you. Either report the theft and turn her in. Or carefully back away.
Meanmommy02 11
Id totally report the theft. That's just not cool
VitalDistance 14
It's either she has a problem or she's just using you. I'm hoping it's not the latter because that sucks either way dude.
gintwinsmoore 20
screen your girlfriends from now on so this doesn't happen again.
Liyuesigs 8
Yeah, run an FBI background check before dating anyone.
gintwinsmoore 20
yeah that's a GREAT IDEA! (SERIOUS SARCASM HERE)
vlalam 24
It's time to kick her out physically, emotionally, metaphorically and literally..
snarkytruth 37
Time to see if she has anything else of yours then leave and change your locks. Hope you haven't shared any passwords or accounts esp. financial ones with her. Stole your laptop and your trust.
snarkytruth 37
She stole your laptop and your trust
rachelllllb 18
wow!! really? hope you got them back!
Gillett 23
I guess that means that you're single again?