Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. I recognized him. He's the guy that broke into my car and stole my backpack two weeks ago. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw my dad for the first time in ten years. He was stealing my car. FML
Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I got into a car accident. The car I hit belongs to my girlfriend's father. We never met before. He strongly believes in "first impressions." FML
Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML
Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, I was meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time. When I went to shake her dad's hand, I broke his watch. FML
Today, I was introduced to my dad's girlfriend of six months. I've already heard them sleeping together several times, and seen her car pull away early in the morning. After meeting face to face, I also learned that she's only two years older than me. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my dad. He met him after my boyfriend ran his truck into a tree, and my dad had to pick us up. FML
Today, as I was driving in reverse, I hit my boyfriend's mom's car. I met her for the first time while giving her my information. FML
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Top comments
1DisGR8 32
My favourite thing about this entire FML is your name
Pixiewolfe 46
Did you get your backpack back?
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Comments (22)
1DisGR8 32
My favourite thing about this entire FML is your name
kazekai8 11
The Irony is thick with this one
Druu 53
OP, you do realize your username makes you sound like a rapist? Perhaps, use "took" her virginity next time.
Pixiewolfe 46
Did you get your backpack back?
Exaspera 55
Can you turn him in?
ezrajab 22
Damn that's awkward sorry op
MidnaLink 35
Virginity after a backpack… I suppose that's perfect revenge in some universe.
Mike3258 18
yes. in this universe
Talented73 54
Depends what was in the backpack.
Glowworm56 27
That username is hilarious!
RichardPencil 32
He smashed your window, you smashed his daughter's hymen. Let's call it even!
Mons_fml 27
Good! He steals Your backpack, You steal His daughter! An eye for an eye.
Talented73 54
Or an eye for something else!
Mike_Oxhard 14
There are two possible options here OP. A) Your girlfriend's dad is already aware you are with his little girl and he's stalking you. Although that was the first time you met him, that's not he first time he's met you. He simply stole your backpack because he's insane and has some sort of plan in play. Or it's option B) You don't have to ask your girlfriend's dad what he does for a living... he's a thief. Has it ever occurred to you that your girlfriend may have lured you to him? Did you see that movie Get Out? Dude... GET OUT.
species4872 20
You should be a conspiracy theorist. Option C and the most logical, It was co-incidental that he was the same guy.
rivenrock 14
He took the backpack to check if you carry condoms.