Today, I overheard my parents talking about me and discussing how I've never had a boyfriend. My mum laughed that maybe they should pay someone to go out with me, and my dad replied, "Heh, not enough money in the world." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my dad telling my mum that the only way I'm ever going to get into a relationship is if I "pose as a woman and con some gullible bastard online." He's probably right. FML
Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML
Today, I was invited by my boyfriend's parents for dinner at their house. The dinner went well I thought, until I was getting ready to leave. Before I could make it out the front door, I could hear them discussing their disappointment that their son would ever consider someone like me. FML
Today, my mum asked when she's getting grandkids. I had to tell her that, at 21 years-old, I hadn't even managed to get a boyfriend yet. FML
Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML
Today, I overheard my dickhead dad telling my girlfriend that she's too good for me, then asking if she really wants to settle for someone like me. FML
Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents for the first time. My dad took one look at him, sighed and said, "You deserve someone better. Someone who is responsible, and has their priorities straight in life." Beyond upset, I told my dad that I love him. My dad disgruntledly responded, "I was talking to him." FML
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Dallasluver19 14
Nice parents you got there. You should prove them wrong.
plagiarismo 16
Can I, like, buy you some new parents?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (83)
Lafayo 9
there's someone for everyone, they come along when you least expect it. no rush, ignore ignorance & enjoy your life!
wunderbar1 9
It's about quality, not quantity. Who cares if you haven't had a bf yet... It's best to be looking for that one amazing guy instead of just dating multiple guys who treat you badly. Don't let your parents get to you.
AussieChild 22
My parents are the opposite, ha. I'm 22 and married, and they would have loved nothing more than for me to be single and travel the world, like my older sister.
Ksweety_fml 27
Awhh,, your parents ain't shit for that. That's so wrong. It's okay, OP. One day you will find your soul - mate. Don't let that get into your head..
majlymad 2
I know the feeling op my parents tease me about not ever having a long term gf
horneyhic 15
Sweetheart find me
Mirakledba 10
prove them wrong. And once you introduce them to him, say " DIDNT need any money at all"
Tannasgh 22
Meg???
chanelleyy 26
I can imagine my mum and my family aunt doing that to me...FYL OP
Gnu_fml 9
Blame it on the genes! What a horrible thing to say about their own child. I'm sure you are just as good a person and pretty as anyone. Heads up OP, be proud of yourself. The right person will come along when you least expect it. Don't let silly comments like that bring you down.