Today, I overheard my parents discussing whether or not they could trust me being alone in the house for 2 days. They then came to the decision that I'm too unpopular and unattractive to ever throw a wild party or get laid. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized the only reason my mom trusts me to stay home alone for long periods of time is because I don't have enough friends to throw a party. FML
Today, after coming home from hanging out with a few friends, my mom told me that I shouldn't hang out with them any more. Why? Because "they are way hotter than I am and I'll never get a boyfriend if I'm always the ugly one in my group." FML
Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home drunk from a party last night. They said I couldn't hang out with my best friend anymore as he's a "bad influence". He was the only one sober in our group and drove me home safely. FML
Today, I overheard my parents talking about me and discussing how I've never had a boyfriend. My mum laughed that maybe they should pay someone to go out with me, and my dad replied, "Heh, not enough money in the world." FML
Today, my parents heard me leaving my room at 2 am, and freaked out because they thought I was sneaking out. I was too embarrassed to tell them that I was getting food instead of having a social life. FML
Today, my parents said they know I don't do drugs or drink because I have no friends to do drugs or drink with. They are right. FML
Today, my parents yelled at me for coming home at 1am this morning from a friend's birthday party. I'm 30 years old. FML
Today, I sent a forward to everyone in my phonebook saying, "HOUSE PARTY-NO PARENTS, LOTS OF ALCOHOL, MAYBE A CHANCE TO HOOK UP." I then got a reply from my mom saying, "I'm probably the only one that would show up." Even my mom thinks I'm a loser, and I'm now grounded for 3 weeks. FML
Today, despite the fact that I'm 20 years-old, my parents never allow me to go out and have fun with my friends, under the pretext that I'm a girl. I'm stuck at house all year long, I only go out to the college they forced me to study at, and they decide everything about me. I’m tired. FML
Today, my parents told me they're glad I'm an "ugly nerd" because they don't have to worry about me getting into trouble or having a teen pregnancy. FML
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Top comments
MissSmiley613 0
Ouchieee, sorry. But now you can prove them wrong during those two days!!!
fueledbyellie 0
Your parents sound awfully charming.
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Comments (94)
Spac3Ghost 0
hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
scarletchamber 0
u r a bitch #1
fueledbyellie 0
Your parents sound awfully charming.
MissSmiley613 0
Ouchieee, sorry. But now you can prove them wrong during those two days!!!
Stryker78cRS 15
They probably knew you were listening and did that as a joke Always be optimistic
MissSmiley613 0
Ouchieee, sorry. But now you can prove them wrong during those two days!!!
DanishDame 0
They surely don't trust you. Don't try to prove them wrong by acting irresponsible. Instead ENJOY the freedom of having the house to yourself, and then find yourself a girlfriend to prove them wrong of their awfull ideas of you! Good luck!
wh4t3v3R 0
Seriously, pick up a girl at the rager your going to throw. Then leave your used condoms around. And if you fail to get some, leave some used condemns and empty beer bottles around anyway, just to get back at them.
ming88 0
i moderated this! found it so funny!
CallMeHush 1
I just wonder if they are right. If you do pull off a party remember, it isn't great until the cops have been there at least 3 times.
geppy 0
They don't trust him, they just think he won't manage to throw a party or get laid ven if he tries. Seriously, OP, FYL.
izzyhate 0
use the pizza money to get hookers.
8trickster8 0
then use the hookers to score some cocaine
GanjAxZermA 0
prove them that you can be trusted even though they think that of you. just dnt do anything stupid.