Today, I babysat a 4-year-old child for my neighbor. It seems he had diarrhea. The evidence of this is in his pants, down his leg, on the couch, on the bathroom floor, smeared on my wall, and in the shape of a brown handprint on my shirt. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was babysitting to make a few extra dollars. While changing one of the kid's diapers, I turned around to find the other kid gone. I turned back around frantically, only to get poop flung at my face. I guess I found him. FML
Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML
Today, I was babysitting my 5 month-old nephew, who hasn't pooped in two days according to his mom. Well, he pooped. I accidentally stuck my finger in it. While I was wiping my finger off, he rolled over and peed on my new carpet. I rolled him over to clean the pee and he opened fire and pooped again. FML
Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML
Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML
Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML
Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML
Today, I discovered that my 8-year old is not fully toilet trained when a turd fell out of his pants, shortly after introducing him to his new babysitter. FML
Today, I babysat my niece and thought a quick shower would be fine. I left her watching cartoons with a blanket and returned to find she’d used washable paints on the carpet and her hands, leaving tiny colorful footprints to the couch. Her proud smile made me forgive the mess, but I spent the evening scrubbing. FML
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Top comments
Gixie 25
Sounds like a shitty time.
herpaderpaherp 17
Looks like he found a new form of finger painting
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Comments (90)
Stefanie88 24
It only "seems" like he had diarrhea??
Adhdkid107 9
Oh god OP, FYL. I mean hopefully you got tha kid in the bath and cleaned all of that up without puking. Then call one of your friends or the kids parents and ask to borrow a shirt. Sorry about your shitty day.
stevothedevo 25
Thats the worst kind of Surprise..
Mossears133 15
But he made it himself, and isn't that the best kind?????
01Ben21 10
This grossed me out almost as much as it made me laugh.
miss_sqwert 19
Sounds like you not the best babysitter
MlleMC_fml 19
Have you ever tried taking care of a 4-year-old with diarrhea? They're not yet used to run to the toilet in time. ;)
arsenicalhumor 30
From the looks of it, 38- you're not the greatest with grammar.
LyraAlluse 25
One time I babysat a kid who decided to go poop in the bathtub when I was giving her a bath. I feel your pain.
larsak 3
Sounds like a shitty situation LOL
Bcfrmkc816 17
Sounds like you weren't watching him.
Ayanpatel95 7
U seem to get the clues pretty fast
MlleMC_fml 19
I remember where my little brother was about 5 years old and he had diarrhea, my mom put a diaper on him in case he couldn't get to the toilet in time.