SK8 OR DIE
Today, I asked a random guy at the skate park if he knew anyone who could sell me some weed. Turns out he was a parole officer. FML
Today, I asked a random guy at the skate park if he knew anyone who could sell me some weed. Turns out he was a parole officer. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at an MA meeting, I ran into the cop who'd pulled me over and given me a ticket for marijuana possession. FML
Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML
Today, I was chilling out with my friend in a parking lot, when a police officer came up to the vehicle and suspiciously asked what we were up to. My friend sarcastically said, "Uh, doing drugs? Planning a drive-by? Haha!" We soon found ourselves in the back of a cop car. FML
Today, I was selling weed to a guy by text. He was using our code, saying, "Can I book a tutoring session at 6 o'clock?" I asked, "How many hours do you need?" He replied, "Three please." I said, "Sure." Then he said, "Just leave it in the blue Adidas again." FML
Today, when I went to the gas station to buy beer, some underage punk outside asked me to buy him booze. I told him to get bent, but the dumbass cashier had seen me talking to him, and refused to let me buy alcohol because, "This is obviously a sting." FML
Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML
Today, I went to meet my girlfriend's parents at her sister's play. The moment I introduced myself, I realized that her father was my probation officer. FML
Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML
Today, my life is so messed up that when I got pulled over, the officer asked about my life and not only did I not receive a ticket, he made me write down his personal number, patrol number and to call if I ever needed a favor or to talk, telling me that I had a friend in him. FML
Today, I went to a going away party for a coworker. I had brought weed for the party and at one point a guy asked me if I have a Grindr. I replied, "No, I don't use those dating apps. I do have a Fetlife but that's it, if you want it." He apparently meant a weed grinder. Most awkward 3 hours ever. FML
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Top comments
saberjpg 6
Well, he probably did know a guy who could sell you weed.
mike3775 39
Stupid is as stupid does
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Comments (17)
mike3775 39
Stupid is as stupid does
MidnaLink 35
The fact that you even did that… *sigh*. Well, at least you didn’t say YOUR Parole Officer.
ojosRojos 28
Yeahhh it’s never a good idea to ask random strangers for something illegal. YDI
bullsonyourface 20
what are you, 12?
saberjpg 6
Well, he probably did know a guy who could sell you weed.
Mungolikecandy 19
It takes a new type of dumb to randomly ask someone to point them towards drugs without knowing who they are.
RichardPencil 32
So, did he hook you up with a good one?
bl3ur0z3 17
That reminds me of the time I asked some random guy at the bar if he knew a good hitman. He didn't, but turns out his brother was a cop who was able to name a few.
Tim Meller 1
so he did
7and7is 20
Yeah, an adult at a skate park, nothing suspicious about that dude.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Do you not know who Tony Hawk is?
JackFaire 27
Uhm what? It's 2019 skating has been a thing since the 80s. Acting like it's weird for an adult to be at a Skatepark is like acting like it's weird for a bunch of adults to be at the football field watching a bunch of other adults play a game. People don't drop hobbies and interests when they become adults.