Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in an attempt to potty train my 2-year-old, I sat her on the toilet and waited for several minutes. I finally gave up and lifted her off the toilet just in time for her to pee on my new shoes. FML
Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML
Today, my daughter watched a potty training video on Sesame Street. In the middle of the video, she got up and ran to her potty to practice. She then announced, "All done!", and proudly closed the lid to her potty. She then immediately stood on top of it and peed. FML
Today, I really had to pee while babysitting. Normally this isn't a problem, except the kids were sleeping and going potty would wake them up right before their parents were due home. Desperate, I decided to pee in a cup in the kitchen and wash it down the sink. Their parents came home mid-stream. FML
Today, the 3-year-old I nanny wanted to prove to me that he was tall enough to pee standing up in front of the toilet. When he realized he actually was tall enough, he got excited and misdirected his stream, covering himself, his brother, and me in urine. FML
Today, my 2-year-old daughter started showing signs of understanding the potty training concept. She announced to my mother-in-law that she needed to go potty, only to be flatly told, "No, you don't." So she crapped herself. Now it's going to take forever to train her. FML
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to let my 19-month-old son watch me pee, since I'm trying to potty train him. I didn't consider that he might try to grab my penis. When he did, I was startled and peed all over the floor and my son. Good job dad. FML
Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
banana2022 4
You didn't think to show her by peeing in a big kids' toilet? YDI for that genius idea.
outofmyelement 0
eww, you used a toddler potty? you couldnt just use a toilet?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (125)
flygirlnene 0
What does FTW mean?
lllo45 0
FTW *For The Win*
spamme 0
this post is great!
deaditegirl 0
And you couldn't have stopped your flow? Learn some bladder control. YDI.
fml131996 0
ppl shes a girl she sits down when peeing she cant see like a guy when peeing give her a break just because she did a stupid move doesnt mean shes stupid and to u #125 the only way she could have stoped if she felt it on her butt or she has and eye comming out of her vagaina
wuteva 0
what a dumb ass.. i have 3 little girls and the COMMON SENSE thing to do would go on the REAL toilet and tell her 'see you have to do pee pee on your potty/toilet like i do with mine.... like a big girl!!' YOU COMPLETELY DESERVED IT!! oh and uh...learn to stop peeing when needed
nike1 0
This can't possibly be true? Why didn't u just stop?
420bliss 0
aren't those potties pretty deep?
kacie_fml 0
hm. i cant stop in the middle of peeing. i can understand how this happened, but i cant understand why youd pee on a kid potty though.
GriefBacon 0
You're not supposed to go in HER potty to show her how it's done. You're supposed to go in YOUR potty.
CannibalGuy 0
I'm surprised that not that many people have mentioned that, you know, it IS possible to stop peeing. Why didn't you just STOP when you realised what was going to happen? And don't say 'I can't do that' because it's the SAME MUSCLES that you use to prevent yourself from peeing whenever there's anything in your bladder.