Today, my boyfriend kept trying to convince me to do anal with him. After denying him several times, he told me, "Why? It feels good, trust me." I asked him how would he know. There was a long awkward silence, then he then replied, "I'm not gay, I swear." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after months of a very healthy sex life with my boyfriend, he asked me to let him try anal. I'm dead-set against it, so I tried to let him down easy by jokingly saying that I would, but only if he let me try it on him first. He said, "Sure." Fuck. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML
Today, I agreed to anal with my boyfriend, but when I told him anal takes prep, like stretching and lubing, and you can’t just jam a knob up there like in a porno, he lost all interest, asked for a blowjob, and when I said no, he started sulking. I struggle to remember why I’m with him. FML
Today, I was going to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. He couldn't get hard and pouted about it for nearly two hours. When I went to comfort him, he said, "Man, I hope I'm not gay." FML
Today, I was waiting downstairs at my boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over and said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smiled thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continued, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML
Today, after years of telling my boyfriend I don't do anal, I agreed to try it once just to get him to stop whining about it. He was so gung-ho that he tried to force it in without doing enough "relaxing preparation" and he split the muscle around my ring. Now I need surgery. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied, dead serious, "That's nice and all, but anal speaks louder than words." FML
Today, I found out the only reason my boyfriend asked me out is because he thought I "looked like a girl who'd be into anal". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Dfox 0
she's not a prude because she doesnt want a weiner up her butt. If she is uncomfortable with it, her boyfriend should be understanding..
Fr0gg13 0
that means he prob a kinky freak that is extremly open with anything sexual. not many ppl understand that and instantly think it's homosexual thing.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (142)
kira1366 0
you sure he's not gay?> kinda sounds like it... just saying ;)
jeffreebitch 0
vajayjay's gross Dx hehe I would of liked to be one of Jeffrey Dahmers victims ;)
DalekScythe 0
Cyanide & Happiness moment anyone? :)
aragmir 13
At least he's honest!!
Muthalecka 1
Lol story of my life
Tekeler 3
FHL he just wants something tight for a change. ur just so loose and unwilling to try things. hope he breaks up with you.
kenjenkei 32
Wow, I'm sensing some unresolved anus-related rage issues. I'd offer to help, but I'm pretty sure you'd rather just keep randomly insulting strangers on the internet. :)
afulks78 11
Lol
Irakli_1 27
:D
BestestMama 6
I would put my finger in his butt :) aha
WizardJeremy 13
Gay sex envolves anal and if a straight guy says he wants to do anal, then he's either gay or bi because anal was invented by homosexuals, it's the only way homosexuals can have sex