Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate in the backseat of his car, when a police car pulled up behind us. My mom later told me that intimacy was fine, just not in a car. We were in the car because she told me that intimacy was fine, just not in her house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML
Today, I was caught doing it with my boyfriend in a car because we wanted to have privacy from my family. I'm a grown adult with my own home. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend at her house, and her dad saw us. She decided that she didn't feel like riding along when it was time for her dad to drive me home, and went to bed. I, on the other hand, got to have a 15-minute conversation about the merits of "physical boundaries." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML
Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to get hot and heavy in my truck at our favorite park. We started going at it and we were both butt naked when I saw a car pull into the lot. Not only was it a cop car, but the first thing the cop asked my girlfriend was, "Are you being held against your will?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were at his parents' house when things started getting hot. Out of respect, we stopped and just cuddled, making us able to hear his parents banging. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that her mom doesn't give us any privacy when we're at their place. I suggested that we go to my place for a change, and she agreed. Her mom called my house three times to see what we were doing. We're well beyond teenagers. FML
Today, I went out of town with my mother-in-law. I don't know what possessed her to start questioning me about her son's and my sex life. When I told her I wasn't talking about that, she began to discuss her and my father-in-law's bedroom habits. The car ride was two hours. FML
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Top comments
GemmaStyles 14
What makes you think the backseat of his car would've been a better option?
Pleonasm 36
Intimacy is fine, OP, just nowhere on this planet, is what she's trying to tell you. But go ahead and find that place where it's fine.
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Comments (119)
JaneChemi_fml 21
noor said backyard
JaneChemi_fml 21
besides. what dumbass camps in the front yard???
thewife5 19
Apparently you aren't ready for intimacy since you don't have a proper place to do it.
MisterEx 28
Above the roof, OP. on the roof.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
I'm aware that he said backyard.
caligirllife 11
You can't go to his house?
xAttackAttackx 25
67- I believe Spongebob and Patrick had a fantastic time camping in their front yards.
LyraAlluse 25
You can not do that Sam I am, not on a boat, not on a train, not on a log, not in a plane. No you cannot do that Sam I am, so forget about it and eat your ham.
Cali_Michele21 6
Not really sure how in your car is public sex? I mean, if no one can see you, what's the problem?
TheNewGuy03 29
All they have to do is roll up the windows, breathe really heavily until they hyperventilate so that the windows fog up, then go at it until the only indication that anyone is banging is the car shaking or hand prints in the condensation à la Rose from Titanic
thewife5 19
A car has windows... Therefore it is indecent exposure. I wouldn't want to be walking through a parking lot with my kids and explain that to them.
nikolkaw 9
Where is it fine then?