pistonchamp159
United States
Today, my husband woke me up at 3 AM by putting whipped cream on my hand and tickling my nose with a feather. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Ugh
United States
Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husband's rather rattling snoring, I finally managed to drop off… only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML
das_shizzle
Wake up call
Today, I woke up to my husband trying to bite my forehead in his sleep. My response? I slapped him hard in the face. What a way to wake up. FML
Qwerty
Australia
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to pick my nose. FML
disgusted
Harpenden, United Kingdom
The language of love
Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Big Baby
Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML
Allie cat
Today, while in deep sleep, I was suddenly awoken by a tickle on my face and nearly threw my cat off the bed. Apparently, 4 a.m. Is the perfect time to touch noses with your human. FML
Anonymous
How deep is it?
Today, my husband rolled over in his sleep, cuddled up to me, and lovingly whispered “I love you Pizza Hut...” FML
Eet-
United Kingdom
Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML
torny>horny
United States
Today, my husband tried to be romantic by throwing me in a bed laid with roses. Too bad he forgot to remove the thorns first. FML
blushingbride
Alpharetta, United States
Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML
Top comments
Fredzter 0
HAHAHA!! He is my hero! If you don't want him, I'll take him!! :D
iDemonChild 0
Lol. Whipped cream and tickling your nose... Classic. =D
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Comments (183)
Gisellee 0
HAHAHAHA. :P
z3r0ram 0
sooo....
FenderYK 0
YDI for being mexican
sublime93 0
Are you kidding me?? This belongs on MLIA. This sucks so much balls
FenderYK 0
If this comment is burried you are officially saying I am a cool donut.
the_stereotype 0
who keeps moderating these? your husband really isn't that original, and the story's not really fml worthy. sorry.
gigi37 0
Totally agree; what kind of idiots let this one on the site? OP: I give you a big fat So What
pistonchamp159 0
they took out the good part of the fml. it was supposed to say that i broke my nose and something funny about how i have pink whipped cream on my face now....
annoyedkid 0
rewr this is the SECOND time i saw YOU posting a dumb comment. Don't U hav a life? or friends? god 86 ur so pathetic. god if u commited suicide by jumping into a lake the only ppl that wud care is the fish that wud push u out of their waterr
the_stereotype 0
what is up with the moderation? why didn't they keep that part? see...now it's an FML and funny
BabyImTwisted 0
Not a fml, but thats pretty cute.
Ejvind 0
MLIA's better then these pile of crap suicide stories.
zZsleeperrZz 0
exactly. idg how this is an fml. this happends to tons of ppl everyday. not really an fml. but OP, I hope you made lemons into lemonade if ya know what meanz.
aerosenna 0
at least it ain't toothpaste.. that would have stung
Fredzter 0
HAHAHA!! He is my hero! If you don't want him, I'll take him!! :D
moemoney8888 7
One thing, he doesn't want you
Kupokupupo 0
hahaha..
toyota_fml 0
hahaha that man is a genius, he things just like me i did my wife that already
hilariousgenius 0
Do it back but with peanut butter.
dragonxfly 0
no, super glue
iDemonChild 0
Lol. Whipped cream and tickling your nose... Classic. =D
M0rt 0
win husband is a win
justmyluck1212 0
lol FYL for having to wake up loke that, but hilarious hubby
elliebutton 0
Grab your video camera and film as you put his hand in hot water, zoom in on his crotch and wait for his reaction when he wakws up and realises what he has done :D
Subtext 10
whipped cream to the face is funny...wetting your bed...not so much actually
byondblnd11 0
literally lol'd on this one, fyl for having an immature husband, but you have to admit, it's funny
aho_matsuri 0
hahhh oh come on, that's hilarious
zee209 0
Oh no! FYL for having a husband with a sense of humor (that's sarcasm, just so you know). Open you eyes and realize that your husband has a good sense of humor and obviously loves you, even though you obviously DO NOT have a sense of humor. I'm sick of these stupid FMLs where people complain about their spouse, boy/girlfriend having a good sense of humor.
Bob4545 0
I care about your opinion very much, zee209, and in the future, if I ever post an FML, I'll be sure to clear it with you first, because I want you to personally approve of my FML. That was sarcasm, in case you couldn't tell.
lolololcheese 0
zee209, you bother me. that wasn't sarcasm, just so you know.
Ashley Beecher 8
I think she meant fml...funny haha
genius_man16 1
I totally agree with zee here, i mean, it's not an FYL, and it's not really that funny. I mean, i SHOULD have been to the OP, but obviously she's got too much stuck in her ass to think so. FherhusbandsL for having such a whiney wife.
BrittyBFMV 0
get over it.