Today, I went to get my hair cut. My stylist had the greatest tattoo of a rat on her arm. I spent the whole appointment thinking about how cool the tattoo was, and what an interesting person she must be to choose such a thing. So I complimented her on it and she said, "Oh it's a wolf." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML
Today, I was taking a shower with my girlfriend when she 'complimented' me by saying, "You’re cute, like a rat." FML
Today, I went to get a haircut. The hairdresser at the counter was kind of cute, so I had to say something non-standard. When she greeted me with her hello, I replied, "Guess what I need from you today?" She looked at me, considered, and replied, "An eyebrow wax?" FML
Today, after months of planning, I finally got my first tattoo: my cat's paw print. I love it so I showed my friends pictures. One said it looks like poop and the other said it looks like I have a disease. FML
Today, I was struggling through small-talk at a party where I knew nobody. Tattoos came up and I started talking about trendy, girly tattoos like feathers, anchors and infinity signs with stupid words in them. Turns out the girl I was talking to had all three. FML
Today, my wife knows tattoos are a huge turnoff for me. She decided the best way to change my mind about them would be to get one. Across her neck. Of our dog's name. FML
Today, I got a haircut at a fancy salon and made small talk with the stylist. While she washed my hair, I said, “Wow, this is better than my girlfriend does it.” She replied, “That’s because I’m a professional. Also, I’m your girlfriend’s cousin.” FML
Today on my birthday, my wife thought it would be a good idea to get matching tattoos. Our tattoo artist happened to be her ex-boyfriend. I sat and listened to them talk about their relationship and how they should stay in touch. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to ask my workmate about her tattoo. She's been in the office for 4 months and I'd always wondered why she had a red cheese grater tattooed on her arm. So I asked. Turns out it's a lady's shoe. She walked away from me and never talked to me again. FML
Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML
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Top comments
gracehi 33
The ugliest wolf ever...
AFaye3964 17
Somebody did a bad job, if you thought it was rat.
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Comments (113)
nerdychicreader 15
Her tattoo artist needs to go back to school maybe?
cryssycakesx3 23
tattoo school, huh?
clair_brodie 35
Not sure if you are being serious or sarcastic but in Portland they have schools for tattooing.
cryssycakesx3 23
i guess that's what I get for being sarcastic. in my state I believe they just do an apprenticeship, but I'm not a such artist so I could be wrong. my apologies for my unwarranted sarcasm, 13.
PocketDial 13
Don't know why people down-voted your comment
abhi95 31
#75: Shhhh.. Keep it low.. It's apparently bad manners to point out to people they don't get it cuz they are d.. Oh damn that was close.. I almost said it. It's also a self preservation tip. They don't get it.. So trying to make them get it will not work. It will instead lead to confused anger.. However.. Look at y'all trying to make me feel good again and again. That's really sweet.. Really!
nerdychicreader 15
I don't know why either....
hxnnxh 14
'No no, I didn't say nice rat, I said nice tat..' Play it off if it ever happens to you again OP!
youngbloodfob 4
Rat a tat ? ( fall out boy song ^^)
cryssycakesx3 23
lol if he mistakes wolves for rats again. seems like a pretty unique situation.
Zerizle 19
At least it looked cool...?
ZoroMiHawk 25
This is more of an FML for the stylist than for you, if a customer could not distinguish between a wolf and a rat...
Q1443 10
So she has a tattoo of MoonMoon. Even more interesting
worldclassrager 41
She might think of you as a rat now...
little_one 20
This is why you just say "nice tattoo" and then if she wants to she can tell you more about it.
worldclassrager 41
I figured OP said something like nice rat tattoo for the comment but it was unclear being a vague FML
shudson186 17
How does this really effect your life though?
simplysarcastics 26
I am trying to understand how some fmls don't even seem to affect the op and get posted but when i try and submit a devastating fml it gets rejected. The hell?
otumboo 10
rat, wolf same thing ?
Mellishaw 5
What kind of a wolf has a rat tail? was she messing with you?
lifein2014 13
So when did it become interesting to have a rat as a tattoo...
cryssycakesx3 23
yeah, I thought it was a little bizarre that he thought so much of her because of what he thought was a rat tat.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Because rats are amazing pets and people love them. :)
PokeZilla 9
Maybe she's into Chinese Zodiac signs.