Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realised it takes me longer to take a dump than it does to have sex with my boyfriend. I also realised taking a dump is more satisfying. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd rather jerk off to sexy pictures of me than actually have sex, because he gets too tired. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, I found out that the only way to get my boyfriend to last more than one minute in the sack is to let him watch cartoons while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
Today, it's the fifth time this week alone I've attempted to explain to my boyfriend that I need more than just two minutes of foreplay to get horny. He tells me he's too tired, but is apparently not too tired to receive head and then have sex afterwards. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Anonymous874598 0
Have you tried sucking his dick before sex ?
CallMeHush 1
What is he like 90?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (57)
rosesong2494 3
For some reason I keep seeing FML's like this a lot lately. And for those of you saying to dump him, or that it's OP's fault that it takes a while to get it up, I believe the point of the FML is that he doesn't last long during sex. But that's just me. Perhaps you should try the "Start and Stop" method, OP. It's simple really. In the middle of sex, right when he's about to blow have him stop and pull out for a 30 second breather. When he's calmed down, go right back at it. It may take practice to get it right, but I can assure you it has a 90% success rate. I don't believe this is either OP or her boyfriend's fault. Just unfortunate circumstances. Let's face it: most women just need more time and attention in order to ****** than men do. I'm sorry for the bad luck OP. Hope everything works out for the best!
mphottinger 2
Is his name Gary?
LolCandy 27
I had the same problem with my ex. Still uncertain as to if he might actually be gay instead of attracted to me.
BabyDoll1197 1
I have the same exact problem. Thing is, he can't keep it up for longer than a couple minutes..
xoxo_tsth 3
i knlw this is late, but has he dumped you for a guy yet?