Today, I realized that the amount of time it takes my boyfriend to get an erection takes longer than the actual sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realised it takes me longer to take a dump than it does to have sex with my boyfriend. I also realised taking a dump is more satisfying. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and after 10 seconds he gave up and said "This is more tiring than I expected". FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd rather jerk off to sexy pictures of me than actually have sex, because he gets too tired. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, I found out that the only way to get my boyfriend to last more than one minute in the sack is to let him watch cartoons while we do it. FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML
Today, it's the fifth time this week alone I've attempted to explain to my boyfriend that I need more than just two minutes of foreplay to get horny. He tells me he's too tired, but is apparently not too tired to receive head and then have sex afterwards. FML
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Top comments
Anonymous874598 0
Have you tried sucking his dick before sex ?
CallMeHush 1
What is he like 90?
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Comments (57)
perdix 31
Propose a threesome. Tell him you will find a dude who can get it up quickly and keep up for a while. That ought to motivate him to make an Erection Correction. ;)
infernofalcon 0
Oh perdix :)
perdix 31
OP: For the night of your life, bring: Viagra A bucket of ice The song "Dead Puppies Aren't Much Fun" playing in an infinite loop.
jonny2x4 0
Are you hot? He either needs Viagra or you need to learn how to "fluff" him up. Sounds like you're lazy in the sack. A little bit of help is always appreciated. Learn how to orally pleasure him and you'll see a marked difference.
onnielief 4
So make sure you are as excited as he his before you start. You do realise good sex is not something easily achieved, it taks practice. not really an FML since he can still please you after he has had his ******
Deyette 0
looks like your in the fault
XLauraxLithiumX 0
I disagree #26. Good sex is pretty easy, if you know what your doing. There are lots of things that you can do to fix that. Try a different position, viagra, have him eat more veggies, threesome, and I hate to say it, but the more oral sex you give him, the longer he'll last.
uncletr 0
You lucky girl!
SubjectX 0
ED sucks. one of my friends boyfriend had the same problem. she ended up dumping him and hense forth calls him Limpy Dippy. She's an odd girl.
heartagram_in_ro 0
it's probably a medication not her fault assholes