Today, I went to Target with my girlfriend. As we were walking in, I saw a girl in a crop top and leggings walk by us. I instinctively turned my head to look so I could get her rear view. Not only was she flat as a board from the back, my now-ex noticed, broke up with me, and ordered a Uber home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was walking through Target when I was pulled aside by a very attractive girl who began kissing me. She stopped, because I wasn't who she thought I was. Disappointed, I turned around to see her very angry, very large boyfriend behind me. FML
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML
Today, I went out with my best girl friend to spice up my wardrobe. I recently broke up with my girlfriend, who was constantly flip-flopping from being in love with me to being apathetic towards me. After having a great day, on the way home, my ex pulled up next to our car and I had a panic attack. FML
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML
Today, I was out shopping with my friends when I saw my ex. I instinctively tried to hide by quickly turning around and walking into a store. It was a mirror. I walked straight into my own reflection. FML
Today, I bumped into my ex-boyfriend I still love, and his new girlfriend, who he cheated on me with. Embarrassingly, she was wearing the same top as me. However hers was in size 6, unlike my 16. FML
Today, I saw my ex-boyfriend walking down the street in my direction. I've put on a bunch of weight since we broke up, so I turned to look in the nearest shop window, hoping he wouldn't notice. Unfortunately he did see me, looking straight at a KFC. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend of mine at the store. All was going fine, until she showed me her new fiancé. My now ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, as soon as I got home, my girlfriend was waiting for me at the door. She told me she was breaking up with me. The reason? She found a girl's shirt in my closet and that she didn't need a cheating boyfriend. That shirt was mine. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her father looked me up and down, said, “No” then went back to his TV. My girlfriend immediately broke up with me and threw me out. I even had to get a really expensive taxi home, because we’d driven in her car and I had no idea what part of the city I was in. FML
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Top comments
SAgirl 23
And your complaint is the view was flat?
JasonThorn 23
This has to be ragebait, because it's truly depressing to know OP is this terminally stupid. I mean, this is meme-worthy ADVANCED stupid.
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Comments (4)
JasonThorn 23
This has to be ragebait, because it's truly depressing to know OP is this terminally stupid. I mean, this is meme-worthy ADVANCED stupid.
SAgirl 23
And your complaint is the view was flat?
Hangryko 32
They both dodged a bullet. Stay lonely.
BurnInDemonFire 39
YDI, creepy ****.