Today, I had to explain to my incredibly sheltered 15-year-old brother that no, you don't wear condoms on your balls, and that they don't work by squeezing your balls so the sperm are blocked from coming out when you ejaculate. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my tampons weren't ear plugs. FML
Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my pads were not in fact "big band-aids" and that he should probably remove them from his legs. FML
Today, as a millennial, I had to explain to a baby boomer why he needs to use condoms when having sex with his 25-year-old girlfriend. FML
Today, my 17 year-old brother asked me if I used birth control. When I told him I did, he responded, "Isn't that like using an inhalor when you don't have asthma?" FML
Today, I had to slowly explain to my brother that spooning has nothing to do with using a spoon to clean out a woman's vagina after sex. FML
Today, my little brother, who is 11, explained to me how babies are made. I’m 15. FML
Today, I had to convince my nine year-old brother to stop using my biology textbook as a masturbatory aid so I could actually get some studying done. FML
Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in and there was a note that said, "Stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML
Today, my 10 year old brother caught me masturbating and then said "Oh, so that's how you do it!". He then ran to his room and locked the door. I inadvertently taught my little brother how to masturbate. FML
Today, my younger brother, who is 15, had to show me the quickest way to take off a woman's bra. I'm 12 years older than he is. FML
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Top comments
cutycat136 28
You should tell him that he must get more knowledge on subjects like that before he even considers using one of those for the first time op.
haileyrows 26
Did he get sex ed in Texas or something?
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Comments (88)
arrowgold 19
At least he got some answers from you before embarrassing himself in front of a lady.
Silk_Routes 14
embarrassment or turn on for many
ambidextrousfool 7
How do you wear a long piece of latex on your balls? How do you squeeze them using a condom? Tying a knot around them? Jeez. Your bro is another kind of dumb.
EarlFug 19
If you're single I think I know just the person for you
Joseph24689 14
XD
mads_fml 7
Intervention quick, before he hurts himself
The_fuzz_buzz 4
Sounds like a... Sticky situation...
ber4fun 23
Do they even still teach sex education in schools these days? I hope they never cut the funding for that.
laurellkawes 31
They do, but in some states they need parental permission to attend that part of health class
snazzymcwho 21
Many many places have cut decent sex ed for "abstinence only" which doesn't actually teach kids anything about their reproductive health. They learn to just "not do it" and then their idiot parents and teachers wonder why they end up pregnant with chlamydia.
rockninja 21
it would be really uncomfortable for me to tell something like that. that too to a family member.
rvontr88 21
And this is why Abstinence only education doesn't work...
MenacingMe 17
Amen to that.
hoosierholla 17
He isn't dumb, he was just never taught. He may have more questions op, and if you're uncomfortable talking to him about this then you may want to point him in the direction of someone who can help him!
Miss_Mandi 29
It is up to you to make sure he isn't that sheltered by the time he gets to college, OP!
CliffyB03 28
Your brother is going places! Not college, but definitely places!
DaDezza244 31
How on earth did you manage to mistake the word 'son' with brother?
be82tw 17
@66, Op said brother.