Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML
Today, I came home to to find my roommate spinning on a computer chair, shitting everywhere. He'd taken Peyote. Now the whole place smells of poop. FML
Today, after I unfortunately woke up too early and too quietly at my new-ish boyfriend's place (we've been together for about a month), I walked into his bathroom to discover that he's one of those freaks who drinks his own piss every morning. FML
Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Maggey 19
The sixth conversation is when it's time to dump the pitcher on him while he sleeps.
trollcrusher 17
When you gotta go, you gotta go.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (73)
kristnschrm 0
That is pretty disgusting.
LuckyLynx7732 5
Sounds like its time for a new roommate. Just hope you don't find his turds in a jar.
eccentrix 12
Maybe you should stop doing it if the conversations are ruining your life so much.
Negroification 7
What business of yours is it if he wants to pee in jugs? Why can't you just stay out of his room if you care so much?
Drizzelhell 3
Well dont blame him he could not leave his modern warfare.
KrayKrayGurl117 7
You could seriously use it for an epic April Fools.
firefighterjohn 9
dude chill out its lemonade.
k3fml 0
What a lazy douchebag. Move out!!!
luccmon 6
I feel like you take really long showers.
craigi 3
Why don't you mind your own business ?