Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML
Today, I came home to to find my roommate spinning on a computer chair, shitting everywhere. He'd taken Peyote. Now the whole place smells of poop. FML
Today, after I unfortunately woke up too early and too quietly at my new-ish boyfriend's place (we've been together for about a month), I walked into his bathroom to discover that he's one of those freaks who drinks his own piss every morning. FML
Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML
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Top comments
Maggey 19
The sixth conversation is when it's time to dump the pitcher on him while he sleeps.
trollcrusher 17
When you gotta go, you gotta go.
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Comments (73)
The_F3rris 11
Just do something nasty in return every time they pee in a container. Like, oh say, shit in a bag and sneak it into their room. Use your imagination.
npearson5290 4
Maybe he's trying to make homemade explosives. Watch out...
odexy 12
Eh, I fully admit to taking alternative bathroom measures. However, my roommate enjoys spending 2+ hours in the damn bathroom and the only useable bathroom is down two flights of stairs :| so really, it's in between pissing my pants or a container at that point.
freakguy455 0
As long as he doesn't leave them lying around for long periods of time stinking up the place, why is it any of your business what he does in his own room...
TheyCallMeDamien 18
move or pour it on his bed and say it fell over
noisebox 1
Hope you guys aren't drinking from them at some point..
usaf_baby 2
If you aren't sharing a room I don't see that it's your place to tell him what he can and can't do in his own room. Don't get me wrong I agree it's disgusting but he's paying rent so he can do what he wants. He probably feels like you're over stepping your boundaries and acting like a mom, so he's probably doing it to piss you off.
BrotherTheo 31
My Gut was to click I agree. You know what? You've witnessed 5 Other occasions. Sorry. Health issues aside, If your roomate is doing something intolerable to you, and after even the 2nd or even *3rd* time it's not changing Get The **** Out, or get them out depening on the circumstances. If you're not changing your situation, I'm sorry, it's also your own damn fault, sorry.
nattynatters 14
"Pissing in Jars With Boys," a delightful Drew Barrymore comedy.
skyeyez9 25
Reading roommate stories on FML make me thankful I can afford to live in my own house, without needing a roommate to pay rent (or mortgage depending on the situation).