Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML
Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML
Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML
Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
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Top comments
seemetrot_fml 16
Somehow I feel like this is a common occurrence for university students..
Elielili 13
Beer tastes like piss anyways, you won't notice the difference;)
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Comments (36)
Elielili 13
Beer tastes like piss anyways, you won't notice the difference;)
grajax 24
I am quite offended. The piss I drink is of utmost quality and taste; how dare you imply that piss tastes bad? Shame on you, sir. Shame on you.
thehappycamper 13
Be a dear, and grab the poor fellow a bedpan.
Sandsh8rk 36
If he's gonna be that lazy, he may as well invest in a diaper.
seemetrot_fml 16
Somehow I feel like this is a common occurrence for university students..
BetaForceBeef 4
I'd be so pissed if that happened to me. I'll let myself out
Sandsh8rk 36
Please do.
whatsausername7 16
I personally prefer a 2 liter but that's just me
Chloe555_fml 27
Until it gets stuck.
0to100rq 6
It can't get stuck :'(
Laphog 17
It's okay. He hasn't installed a catheter attached to 50 feet of hose that drains into the toilet yet...it can always get worse
hyperreader 15
Why so I feel like you are talking out of personal experience
cheshirecat13242 32
Maybe he found one of those "life hacks" that are just jokes, intended to screw with people?
born_hustla 26
Damn, I wonder what's next..taking a shit in a pizza box?
False_Stupidity 42
Don't give him ideas! He might be reading this.
Tomryan279 10
He needs to grow up and use the toilet.
coolmike699 26
During my sophomore year at college, my roommate got so wasted he pissed in the microwave. That's way worse than in a beer bottle.