Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML
Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML
Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4 a.m. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML
Today, after 3 days of hearing a car alarm going off almost continuously, the city finally came and towed it. Immediately after, the owner showed up with a switchblade, inquiring who called the city. My neighbors ratted me out, despite the fact I had nothing to do with it. FML
Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML
Today, I awoke to banging at my door. It was my neighbor, accusing me of stealing her mail to spy on her, because apparently she thinks I must be some sort of secret agent. The cops don't believe me when I call, and she won't go away. FML
Today, I woke up at 6:00 am to the sound of somebody laying on their horn outside my apartment. I ran outside to yell at them only to find out it was my car. The horn was shortcircuting. All my neighbors stood on their porch laughing as I repeatedly punched my steering wheel to make it stop. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML
Today, I heard my downstairs neighbor being beaten by her husband. I anonymously called 911, hoping to help. She must've seen me giving the cops my statement because as soon as they left, she knocked on my door and punched me square in the face while screaming, "Mind your own business bitch!" FML
Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML
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Top comments
writerchic85 26
Take video of them doing it and call the cops again.
SoulEaterSE 23
Now call the cops on them for damaging your property
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Comments (42)
sousaphonist 14
Only one thing for it... call the cops again.
Bragi 12
1. The plural is "neighbors." 2. Time to call the cops again.
Lalala579121 28
I'm pretty sure they're using it as the possessive of the sound that woke OP up belonging to/caused by the neighbor. It's unnecessary, but still correct.
soulreaper12296 28
Well time to call the cops again, and hope your neighbor gets arrested.
Jryan952015 7
Next time mind your own fu-cking Business
worldclassrager 41
I think he'll hate you even more but I would report that to the authorities for trespassing and vandalism
brenton490 19
The real question here is what do they hit next for calling the cops this time? Best of luck on!
zefronke8 25
I hate it when my neighbor's attacking just suddenly becomes my car
Cirrus1 2
time to call the cops again and dont wimp out press charges and follow through if that dont stop them then the next time shoot them
rupertajm90 15
to which you called the cops on them again for vandalizing your property and press charges i hope