Today, I found out that, for over three years, my boyfriend has solely been dating me to get closer to my mom. Apparently, "she's a total MILF." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend told me that my mom paid him to date me. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend's mom still refers to his ex as 'the daughter she never had.' FML
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend's mother still calls his ex-girlfriend her "future daughter-in-law". FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend of a year is actually my cousin. Thanks, Mom. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's parents. We've been dating for almost 5 months and are extremely in love. His mom basically said to me, "I want what’s best for my son and you aren’t it." FML
Today, my boyfriend just told me that his mom told him to break up with me, and that she would pay him to do it. His mom is a bitch. FML
Today, I found out that the only reason my guy friends actually hang out with me at my house all the time is because they think my mom is hot. FML
Today, my mother is such a nosy, intruding busybody, she has driven away my last three boyfriends who could no longer stand her. My latest fella had even proposed, but he asked for the ring back and you can bet he blamed my mother for repeatedly involving herself in our private business. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my mom and started acting strange. Then my dad came in and was instantly furious. Apparently, my boyfriend is the guy my mom cheated with that caused my parent's divorce. He’s 3 years younger than I am. Gross mom, just gross. Also I’m single again, damn it. FML
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Top comments
Senseless_487 29
Those are some ulterior motives from hell. I think this is one of the rare times to say "dump him" and be right.
Doortje 30
Hopefully over time you'll grow up to look just like her, and then you'll be the MILF.
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Comments (63)
mikeofthunder 13
3 knows the way of a true Jedi Knight. **** yes, 3!
noisebox 1
Maybe you can do a mother daughter thing like in the pornos...,I think everyone would be happy then...
mrphychrs 5
Yall could share him, that seems fair
zaccour 3
She's hotter than u?
SApprentice 34
If he was serious that was the 'sole' reason he dated you, then that really sucks, and he could probably use some therapy. Only a very odd person would date someone for over 1,000 days, each day waiting and hoping to pounce on their mother. That's a big commitment, and I can't tell if that's really messed up or kind of impressive. Look on the bright side, you have a possibility of looking like her by that age. I'm the same way. My mother has a perfectly flat stomach, slim hips, a minimal amount of wrinkles, flawless body skin, and a natural tan. I can only hope I'll look about like she does at that age, but I got my dad's genes, so I doubt I'll be so lucky.
howrudoin 11
"Heyyy Mss Parrkerr". Or is it "MILF MILF MILF!" Id say either one ;)
wellfuuucckme 7
50- Wrong song .....
wellfuuucckme 7
50 - **************
hateevryone 15
Dump his ass
BoratSagdiyev 2
I love me some MILF's but that's pretty douchey.