Today, I accidentally scared my one year-old son with my huge, smelly fart that was really loud. He now won't come near me without crying. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally farted really loud. My 4 year-old brother heard me and started crying, and stopped talking to me for a whole hour. Now he tells everyone about "that time his sister farted." FML
Today, I accidentally let out a silent but obscenely deadly fart in the doctor's waiting room. It was so foul that a woman got insanely pissed at her kid because she thought he'd shat his pants again. FML
Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML
Today, I accidentally farted while shopping. There was an awkward silence followed by a god-awful stink and a lady's little girl bursting into tears. FML
Today, I was at the local grocery store. I've had really bad gas lately, and I accidentally let one go while standing in line. The woman behind me thought it was her kid, and smacked him for farting in public. FML
Today, I farted in a public pool and watched in horror as bubbles of death gas floated up beside my son who started calling me the fart monster in front of everyone. FML
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML
Today, I was holding my son and smelled poop so I checked his diaper, but there was nothing there. Then I realized it was my breath. FML
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Top comments
TCRII 30
Try to get him to understand that he should never trust a fart, but he should always trust his farter (father). Maybe use the Darth Vader voice - Luke, I am you Farter. Good luck.
Cowgirl1293 26
This is way to funny! must have been one epic fart!
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Comments (7)
TCRII 30
Try to get him to understand that he should never trust a fart, but he should always trust his farter (father). Maybe use the Darth Vader voice - Luke, I am you Farter. Good luck.
manb91gb 15
With a name like Naomi, I'm pretty sure Darth Farter the father in this situation
AmbrosiaFan 19
Oh I'm definitely sorry to hear that. Maybe have someone have fun time face to face with him then put in your lap hiding who you are. Once he's there and happy let him see he's on your lap and you are good to go :)
mfranks19891989 10
😱😱😱😱😱😱😱🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Cowgirl1293 26
This is way to funny! must have been one epic fart!
skippydoda 32
My son giggles whenever someone farts.
J15237 25
As a father that is actually really hilarious. I wouldn't worry about it. It will pass in time. Seriously though really funny. Not much of an FML for you, but it would be one for your kid.