Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I showed my new tattoo to my friends. It's supposed to be a deep, philosophical quote in Latin, symbolizing strength and resilience. My friend, who happens to be fluent in Latin, started laughing hysterically. Turns out, it actually says, "You are dumb." FML
Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML
Today, a woman yelled at me for hurting her. I'm a tattoo artist. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
Today, my friend sent me a link to a "horrible" tattoo that he found online, that a guy had gotten at my tattoo parlor. FML
Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML
Today, a close, funny friend who has quite the attitude, received a long email from a long-time friend of hers, telling her how difficult she is. When I told her it doesn’t matter, that she is still wonderful, she went off on how bad a friend I am for saying that, and then deleted me off WhatsApp. FML
Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML
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Top comments
joeymo304 9
Not your problem she's defective
NIRVANA1990s 1
hey its her fault she's a bitch
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Comments (186)
Davick 0
that's when you get a total stranger to point it out and then you two can make up and beat the tattoo Guy out right.
SoCcErChIcK33 0
Your friend has the mind of a 4 year old. I mean really, social circle? Tell that bitch to grow up!
rems109 5
If she wanted a tattoo that said bad bitch, she is a defective female.. So no harm done there..
woeisme134 0
in the end, she's still the defective female:-)
woeisme134 0
in the end she's still the defective female
kazell09 1
That's what u call a defective bitch...
theonlysweetpea 10
You should have slapped her, told her you'd rather not be friends with a defective female, then call her a dumb bitch, walk away
milady666 2
And the problem is...?
benhd1 14
A friend showed me a new tattoo of hers, she said it was Chinese for "Good Soul" It said "picnic table" She didn't take it very well and accused me of lying since "white people can't speak or read Chinese."
drawmyhearton_fml 3
Picnic table and defective female. XD that's beautiful. But As much as it makes me laugh, I'm just not gonna get a tattoo in a language I don't understand. I'm too afraid of the result.
blutigenbonbon 10
Lol. What a dumbass...that's kinda funny. xD but anyway you deserve better friends.