Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while we were at a work party, I noticed a drunk lady in the mix. I pointed out to my boss how dumb she looked. It was his daughter. FML
Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML
Today, the girl who works at the liquor store came to where I work. She recognized me. FML
Today, I had to drive my drunk parents home from a party. They leaned out the window and barked at everyone we passed all the way home. FML
Today, working in a liquor store, I had to tell a girl I couldn't sell her alcohol since she was severely intoxicated. She told me to "cash me ousside, how bow dat?" then smashed a bottle of wine and left. FML
Today, an intoxicated gentleman stumbled into my shop requesting alcohol, which I do not sell. When I informed him of this, he expressed his disappointment by urinating on the floor. FML
Today, I was at a bar, when a heavily drunk guy came up to me and slurred "Fuucckkk lady, your face... not even with beer goggles!" FML
Today, my dad approached two girls at a store and told them I'd crashed into their car. They didn't find it funny either. FML
Today, when I went to the gas station to buy beer, some underage punk outside asked me to buy him booze. I told him to get bent, but the dumbass cashier had seen me talking to him, and refused to let me buy alcohol because, "This is obviously a sting." FML
Today, a drunk man started yelling at the lamppost outside my house, demanding to be let inside, all while my neighbors watched. That man is my dad. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
HeroZeroPlayer 23
wtf is up with fml? the fmls are like not corrected before post anymore? like in this one there's a random loool???
Steffi3 40
Tell them 'Sorry, kids aren't allowed to sell alcohol'
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (20)
Schala360 27
you still showed them where the booze were right?
Wutdafuqq 24
*You (sentences start with a capital) *was
Schala360 27
im just keeping up with the fml april fools style bro:), no need to be a ****
HeroZeroPlayer 23
wtf is up with fml? the fmls are like not corrected before post anymore? like in this one there's a random loool???
KornyKid 20
im guessing its for april fools.
TrippingOnAcid 29
Press Random, they've done it to literally every FML. That's dedication, I applaud you all
HeroZeroPlayer 23
i have now realized the joke. such dedication i have to say.
myselfkk 20
fml staff is doing it on purpose...april fool
Steffi3 40
Tell them 'Sorry, kids aren't allowed to sell alcohol'
englacobain 14
Why would it be funny if they weren't your parents?
AndyPurdy 31
you have some ****** up parents,tell em to stop drinking so much
zyzy92 8
Only in Montana...
MrConcise 35
I'm going to make a positive comment assuring OP that everything is okay, entirely lacking any context! Am I doing this April Fool's thing right?
pineapples53 18
The grammar is wrong because it's an April fools joke.
Pluiscyam 13
Hupay April fouls day !
abbyade 21
Lol..were you drunk when writing up this fml?