Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came from a 12-hour shift to find my clothes and stuff outside, and the locks changed. I called my mom to let me in and she told me, “Hell the fuck no, I’m not having a drug addicted junkie up in my house! You’re no longer my daughter!” and hung up. Apparently, she found my stash of weed. FML
Today, my mom told me she's a drug addict, sold my bed to buy meth, and then lectured me about how I should be okay with it. FML
Today, my mom barged into my room, threw 5 boxes of condoms at me, then said, "So you don't get pregnant". She still hasn't accepted the fact that I'm a lesbian. FML
Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML
Today, I came home to find my room completely torn apart. My mom and dad start yelling at me asking me why I am doing drugs because she found a tiny baggie on the floor. It was the little bag that spare buttons come in when you buy a dress shirt. FML
Today, my mom went through my drawers and found some antibiotics from Planned Parenthood. She immediately flew into a rage and told my whole family, my aunts, and her church that I was a “loose woman with a horrible disease.” The antibiotics were to treat bacterial vaginosis, not an STD at all. FML
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother came over for a few hours. After she left I went to grab a drink, only to find that three bottles of expensive liquor were missing from our liquor cabinet. FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, I went shopping with my mother, when someone snuck a pack of condoms into our cart while our backs were turned. When we got to the register, my mom, whose wealth makes me ineligible for financial aid, noticed the condoms and she announced that she wasn't paying for the college I got accepted to next year because she doesn't want a promiscuous daughter. FML
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Top comments
LittleMissMack 0
Ugh I hate parents like that. Would they rather you're on birth control or you tell them you're pregnant.
Betty7 0
oh come on... its just birth control.
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Comments (142)
wafflemonger 0
60, take a breath. Not everything has to be about sexism. And speaking of sexism, calling all men ****** is a GIANT cognitive leap. Maybe next time, you should make sure you're without sin before you go casting stones. And your tone is awfully condescending for someone who can't spell "You're a douche." That being said, 58, totally unnecessary. Whether the OP sleeps around or not, her mother shouldn't have called her a *****. Name-calling, deserved or otherwise, is always bad parenting.
sillypun 0
OP -- I give you an A for using birth control.... and an F for keeping the bottles... Unless they are from last night its pretty easy to find a place to put your empties --> any garbage can outside of your home. Total amateur move.
failwhatwhat 0
what a great, mature way to start a conversation. that mother is an inspiration ...
slovesj 0
what a bitch..
x_y_z 0
response the apple doesnt fall far from the tree
Lila_fml 0
#55 relax. A few empty bottles doesn't make the OP an alcoholic. She is probably a teenager and teens experiment. OP, haha that is actually pretty funny. Well at least it makes for a good story. My mom used to ask me daily when I was 15-17 "Are you pregnant yet?" Moms are funny.
usoedo 0
atleast you are using protection. that's pretty mean of your mom.
Spitfire_fml 0
What a bitch.
alwaysalady 0
Move out. Grandma, divorced parent, aunt, someone. After a certain age, your parents need to stay the **** out of your room.
PiousHeretic 0
Agreed with #70. Also, your mother needs to get out of the 19th century; there's more than just the CATHOLIC-APPROVED rhythm method now, ffs