Today, my dog ate a whole case of my son's paintballs, because apparently they are made of a fish byproduct. Not only does the whole house smell like fish, there are countless bright yellow dog turds all over the house and our yard. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML
Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. It had recently rained, and he started rolling in something unidentifiable. When I got home, I discovered it was a mixture of mud and who knows what else. Now my house smells like a swamp. FML
Today, I came home from work and found that my son had taken every single one of his toys out and left them on the floor. Plus some goldfish crackers. FML
Today, my dad decided to make home-made popcorn. He accidentally used old fish oil instead of mazola oil. Now the house reeks of fish and we can't even throw the popcorn out for fear of attracting wild animals. FML
Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML
Today, after bringing my dog back inside, he started whining. I thought it was because he wanted his toys, but he was really trying to say, "Help me," as a torpedo of diarrhea exploded out of him, leaving a trail down the hallway. FML
Today, my dog overturned and ate my trash, leaving coffee grounds and dog puke all over my floor. She also ate the broom. FML
Today, I was eating and my dog kept bothering me. She kept scratching my legs for food, so I took a large piece of fish from my plate and tossed it out into the hallway. It flew right into my mother's face. FML
Today, while cleaning my desk I found a stray gumball. I quickly popped it into my mouth only to discover with horror that it was a paintball. FML
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Top comments
alice_in_mordor 21
Too bad this didn't happen in time for Easter.
Cashtangoteam 10
At least the dog isn't dead.
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Comments (131)
ICastillo 25
I imagine that's how unicorn shit probably looks..
tommyfox 19
At least you can find them!
misslifeguard 7
That is awsome. Lets hope the dog is ok though
hunny797 5
You are here as well??
fischerxx 10
Paintballs are 100% bio-degradable and completely edible...they just taste horrible...kindof like soap
outoftown 27
66- You know how they taste ... why? Sounds like an FML right there.
fischerxx 10
The masks that you wear have slits around the mouth so you can breath easier and every now and then you'll take a hit right there...then the person who shot you has the right to shout "hey, how do my balls taste?"
gracehi 33
Yellow is the new brown.
wildcat90 1
Holy shit thats awesome. Should of uploaded a pic.
melkymac101 17
Haha
BrashlyHonest20 4
Question is, how did the dog get into the paintballs? Did the OP's son leave the case open sitting on the floor?
TurquoiseJesus 15
If the case was left open, but the individual bags were closed, then the dog could easily get through the bag. Or maybe they were less cautious since they figured a dog wouldn't eat paintballs.
jopey 3
Lol...funny
karlcolt45 19
paintballs smell awful
TurquoiseJesus 15
I love the smell of paintballs. The taste, on the other hand...
Enslaved 38
I love the smell of -paintballs- in the morning.
jcrb 11
they do now!!
theboy13 13
The dog won't get sick or die?
fischerxx 10
It might give it diarrhea but other than that he'll be fine...what I can't figure out is why he took the first bite and then kept eating (they taste very bad)...either stupid or starving
skyeyez9 25
The fishy smell probably made him snarf them down. Dogs literally gulp and inhale food without chewing, so that is what prevented him from tasting them and getting grossed out?