Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
Today, while out with my boyfriend I accidentally let out a rather large fart. I was in such shock the only sentence I could make was "I farted." Clearly he was in shock too because the only words he could utter were "I know." FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML
Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML
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Top comments
TROLLFACEdotJPG 5
Challenge accepted?
stepanek911 1
atleast you weren't in an historical gas chamber.
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Comments (177)
Falalala243 0
When he farts in public, you know he's a keeper. :)
Carrotkidd15 5
Then fart back. Then he does it and screams "THIS IS SPARTA!" :)
Carrotkidd15 5
Then fart back. Then he does it and screams "THIS IS SPARTA!" :)
reaxion 25
Or, in this case, "THIS IS FARTAH!"
slushpup9696 12
He sounds like Peter Griffin.
sheethapins 13
Of course, the fat man and that vile woman left me here to visit a war zone and left me here with Herbert again? She's plotting an attack, I knew it! She plans to gas us all! Not if I can help it. Let's see how she likes mustard gas! Victory will be mine!
TheRealPeter 6
Naw, I don't think so. Nheehehehe.
sheethapins 13
Quiet you! I will ... Ugh, now I've gone and soiled myself... Change me, then meet your doom!
Badab1ng 5
I promise you... If you queefed, you would instant win. That's some one shot kill action right there.
fangbanger_kitty 10
Lol I don't know of anyone that queefs on command. Haha! ?
EvilCupcake8361 9
Let the queefing commence !
brunomars69 1
I think I literally just died...
petraphotoDOTca 6
he's immature....but also, awesome and hilarious! congrats
Invisarape 2
There's a difference between being mature and being a little childish and wanting to have fun :P If they had been in a really serious setting it would have been immature, but they were just at a historical mark looking around, no harm done
starsfan_9 7
Fire in the hole!
Capt_Oblivious 10
Time to put on the gas masks and prepare for battle, this could get toxic, and ugly.
perdix 31
Drop trou and take a big, steaming dump right on the floor. Go nuclear or go home!
skyeyez9 25
I remember visiting mammoth cave years ago. The guide turned off all the light.and.asked us all to be silent to show how utterly soundless and black it was in there. A few seconds later, someone ripped a loud, smelly fart. Followed by giggles, gagging and feet shuffling to move away from the smell.
brianjman14 23
I would have loved to be on that tour with you. xD
skyeyez9 25
It was funny! The tour guide was trying to be somber and told a story about a person who got lost in the cave right before he asked everybody to be quiet, as he turned off all the lights. He was trying to get us to imagine being down there stuck in complete silence and darkness......then someone farted. Loudly. Followed by giggling and mayhem.
Shrike 24
Yeah yeah yeah. My guess is you saw that recent illustrated FML (http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/1224721) and made your little story up based off it.
hoonyer 17
Hey, i remember reading that FML, there's even an accompanying comic now