Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, while I was at my girlfriend's parents' house for dinner, and I thought no one was looking, I picked my nose and put it underneath my chair. Turns out she has a little brother who found it appropriate to point at me and scream, "Booger monster, Booger monster!" FML
Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML
Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend was a kid, she enjoyed torturing animals for fun. Nice to know she was lying when she said the idea of harming an animal “makes her sick to her stomach.” FML
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Top comments
nicola1233 0
f your dogs life
Snow_Daisy 7
gross!
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Comments (219)
Furytalon 14
that's fine bugers strengthen your immune system
unohuitis 0
Is your girlfriend 7 or 8?
happykesh 3
Ew
tpayne616 0
That's ******* gross.
SkoomaKi 28
Talk to her. Now.
sammyluvspugs 4
That's disgusting. Your poor puppy doesn't kno he's eating boogies
Blahblah9921 4
thts gross man.. u need to do something
kezzamumma 3
I have to hide my gollies when i'm sick or spit them in the bin, my dog loves them and gets excited when people cough.
FlamingColor 30
Dafaq did i just read?
cmb8280 24
Ahahahaha!! That's freakin' hilarious!!!