Today, I was having sex with my husband. We thought the house was empty so we didn't mind being loud. Apparently, my grandma thought it would be fun to give us a surprise visit. All I found was a note on the counter from her and the spare key saying, "Next time, I'll call." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to surprise-visit my grandparents. After knocking on the door and not getting a response, I opened it and walked in. Upon entering their house and yelling, "Hello", as I turned the corner I saw my near-deaf grandmother folding clothes while watching TV. She was topless. FML
Today, my husband and I finally had the house to ourselves, so we had unusually loud sex. Banging bed, yelling obscenities, super rowdy, etc. I then see my mother-in-law out the window. She had let herself in, dropped off a bag and apparently ran out. Thanksgiving is going to be weird. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, I walked over to my grandmother's house to pay her a visit. I politely knocked on the door, and there was no answer. Fearing that something had happened, I violently broke down the door to find my grandma and her new 80 year-old boyfriend having sex. FML
Today, my husband and I were getting busy on the living room couch when my mother-in-law stopped by and let herself in with a key we didn’t know she had. She then demanded an apology like it was all our fault and stormed out. I still don’t know why she came by. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of someone having sex in the room next to me. I don't have a roommate. Turns out my mom thought I was out of town and used her extra key to bring a guy over for sex. FML
Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML
Today, while on vacation, I realized my parents and grandparents had been running off and doing quite a few errands lately. After doing some sleuthing, I discovered they were taking turns having blood-curdling sex in our other hotel room down the hall. FML
Today, my mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on my husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML
Today, my husband got home and shouted he had a surprise for me. I shouted back that I hoped it was his tasty knob with strawberry lube. Nope, he'd picked up my grandparents for a visit now social isolation is being relaxed. They might be in their 80’s but they’re not deaf, unfortunately. FML
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Top comments
LaColombianita 26
Well I guess grandma learned a valuable lesson. Never show up to your house again for a surprise visit.
DontClickOnMe 28
I wonder how long she stayed there for.
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Comments (131)
blegehlehgleh 0
Doesn't matter, had sex
lrgenesis 19
Still counts!
wittygirl 8
Rule number 34 oh yea
DoctorWhooves13 5
Dery ftw!!
GetHardOrGoHome 7
My grandma enjoys telling me about pornstar *******.. So don't feel bad!
DrMime 10
Gmilf?
GoW_Chick 15
Hey Sasha Grey does have a nice pair, can't help but appreciate them.
fenixtorador1 11
Sasha Grey is into some pretty freaky stuff lol you do have to appreciate it lol
perdix 31
#33 I don't agree about her *******, but I really appreciate that you appreciate Sasha Grey, heh-heh-heh ;)
SeemsToFail 0
Dang grandma you can at least ring the door bell
iseyixes 18
Awesome gramma!
Yousuck24 21
I guess its still better than grandma walking in on you having sex...
EvilCupcake8361 9
Or you walking in on grandma having sex..then promptly joining in. Too far?? *troll face*
dessyrae 0
Omg yea
sergioyslas 1
Haha damn she's probably what do I do now.
Krirn 21
Some quotation marks wouldn't hurt.
GoW_Chick 15
At least she knows now you guys have a healthy and happy marriage, good for you! *high-five*
GoW_Chick 15
I think people are thumbing me down because of the high-five, no one likes high-fives anymore. *gets left hanging* :'(
Shafreeka 8
I'll high-five you! I thought it was amusing. *High-fives GoW_Chick*
Mister_Triangle 21
I accidentally gave you a thumbs down and I can't fix it :O
wlddog 14
*Hold up hand for high five* I gave u a thumbs up to help out.
isis_morrigan 18
Aw, I'll high five you! And I gave you a thumbs up because your comment was awesome, like always! I love reading your comments!
bettyc4 26
EPIC! Hey at least she didn't interrupt and ask for a nasty granny threesome XD
madison8895 11
Awkward.
Isoldael 27
For a moment I read this as "a note from (grandma and her spare key)"... I need to stop reading FMLs shortly after waking up.