Today, my husband and I finally had the house to ourselves, so we had unusually loud sex. Banging bed, yelling obscenities, super rowdy, etc. I then see my mother-in-law out the window. She had let herself in, dropped off a bag and apparently ran out. Thanksgiving is going to be weird. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband and I were getting busy on the living room couch when my mother-in-law stopped by and let herself in with a key we didn’t know she had. She then demanded an apology like it was all our fault and stormed out. I still don’t know why she came by. FML
Today, I was having sex with my husband. We thought the house was empty so we didn't mind being loud. Apparently, my grandma thought it would be fun to give us a surprise visit. All I found was a note on the counter from her and the spare key saying, "Next time, I'll call." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, I finally got some alone time today with the boyfriend (we have kids, so this is rare) and we were going heavily at it when his mother decided to drop in and wouldn’t stop knocking on the front door. Worst timing ever. FML
Today, my mother-in-law, who apparently made a copy of our house key without permission, walked in on my husband and me doing the deed. She went crazy, yelling at me for "defiling" her son. Last week, she yelled at me for not having given her grand-children yet. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I was apparently really loud, because when we finished I heard his mom and grandma sarcastically imitating me outside. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of someone having sex in the room next to me. I don't have a roommate. Turns out my mom thought I was out of town and used her extra key to bring a guy over for sex. FML
Today, I had to break up a fistfight between my wife and mother. Apparently, my mom heard that I finally got the great paying job of my dreams, and told my wife I'd finally kick her "useless ass to the curb." We have to spend the holidays together. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. His mom didn’t know much about it, and she walked in on us. After about 5 minutes she came back up, threw a box of condoms at us, says, "Continue" and walked out. We were still fucking while she was in the room. FML
Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Bobby319 24
Well, it's her fault. She shouldn't have just let herself into your house without prior consent. So don't let it be weird for you.
extremereviews 26
Stare into her eyes at the table on thanksgiving, assert your dominance
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (34)
Bobby319 24
Well, it's her fault. She shouldn't have just let herself into your house without prior consent. So don't let it be weird for you.
laytea 8
Agreed. Just act natural at Thanksgiving. She should know better than to enter someone's home without at least knocking/ringing the bell before letting herself in.
coolmike699 26
To be fair, the FML doesn't say whether she had "prior consent" or not. She might come over all the time and not expect to need to knock. Sometimes things are no one's fault, just bad timing.
mariri9206 32
3, or calling and giving you a heads up that they're coming over.
_Shake_n_Bake__ 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
She is upset you didn't extend the invite to her
MidnaLink 35
Sometimes, you people have sick, sick minds about MIL's.
yerawizardlizzy 27
Not just MILs, almost everyone. I hate comments like these, and they are on every FML where a couple is caught.
MidnaLink 35
Yeah, but as not as bad if it weren't a relative.
coolmike699 26
Loudly FYL.
extremereviews 26
Stare into her eyes at the table on thanksgiving, assert your dominance
BestOrginalName 22
Lol. Exactly what your profile pic is doing?
chirstinap325 23
Did you make eye contact with her? Then it'd be weird. If not, she's got no reason to think you know. Not mamas baby boy anymore lol
magicdust95 31
Well, she did leave a bag.
Jenadpantano 7
That sucks, for sure. But on the other hand, if you have the kind of situation where your mother in law can let herself in (and that's normal for you), its your fault. If that's not a normal thing, then its her fault. Just act like nothing happened for Thanksgiving, sex is normal.
RatedZeus77 4
I don't feel that even if its a normal thing that it's not her fault because it's not like you can prepare for that and I mean they were alone in their own house. Perhaps it should just be that the mother-in-law isn't the bad guy if it's normal.
dragoongirl90 34
The **** is wrong with her just coming into your house? SHE is the one who should be embarrassed.
ApplePie1994 27
Booty had her like.
militarybrat 21
Why would it be awkward? Oh my god you had sex with your husband!
alaina1104 11
Aka the MIL's son. Sex is normal but that doesn't mean it's not awkward in certain situations.
RichardPencil 32
Greet her with "Happy Spanksgiving." Offer her some gravy, saying, "Your son made the gravy -- I love his gravy," Tell her she can have the wishbone, you already have the bone you wished for. Then, she'll give you two weeks notice before she comes over and she'll be in a hazmat suit.
talal_icon 19
this is just amazing!
ClairvoyantVamp 19
I want to like this comment but right now it's at 69