Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's been so long since my fiancé and I have had sex I now apparently have dreams about all-night unprotected screwing marathons with George Bush. FML
Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I told my coworker who I have been crushing on for a while, that I really enjoyed our time last night. I immediately realized that the time we spent last night was in my sex dream. FML
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
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Top comments
Dave_Davington 34
Did he give you the small pleasure of a million orgasms?
Fairyjoshy 13
Sorry, I have to side with your boyfriend here. That's pretty damn funny. But I also understand how it could be mortifying. Don't take it too seriously. Dreams are different from being drunk. Being drunk makes you really honest. Dreams on the other hand have no concern for honesty or lies, they're just random thoughts crashing together and your brain interpreting them in funny ways. Sometimes there's a pattern, and sometimes that pattern is just "You happened to see Donald Trump's picture for all of 0.1 seconds and had a little action with your boyfriend the day before."
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Comments (107)
gracehi 33
And I thought it was bad when I had a sex dream about Seth Rogen. Funny story, after I woke up I learned that "The Interview" was going to be released in select theaters so I took it as a sign to go see it. Why couldn't I have a sex dream about James Franco??? But thanks for sharing your dream about Donald Trump, OP. I was worried I wouldn't be able to fulfill my New Year's resolution to drop a few pounds, but now I've been put off breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
brokeandbroken 4
Make the bedroom great again
schreibergx93 19
This just hurt my eyes, too much internet
Badkarma4u 17
I can totally see that. His mouth never stops moving.
cireofmi 9
It was just a dream, laugh about it.
AwkwardKarma 18
I bet he used money to cover his penis. Who needs condoms when you can throw away more money?
nodai 13
So I guess you enjpy getting the shit beat out of you? (Him to his wife, brutal rape, it's public record)
deathperado 0
Your bf seems to be a keeper if he has good humour about that kind of dreams
Kristoffer 35
He's definitely out to **** the entire country. Starting with his own daughter.
captainsmegma 12
Can we still count on your support on election day?