Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's been so long since my fiancé and I have had sex I now apparently have dreams about all-night unprotected screwing marathons with George Bush. FML
Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I told my coworker who I have been crushing on for a while, that I really enjoyed our time last night. I immediately realized that the time we spent last night was in my sex dream. FML
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
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Top comments
Dave_Davington 34
Did he give you the small pleasure of a million orgasms?
Fairyjoshy 13
Sorry, I have to side with your boyfriend here. That's pretty damn funny. But I also understand how it could be mortifying. Don't take it too seriously. Dreams are different from being drunk. Being drunk makes you really honest. Dreams on the other hand have no concern for honesty or lies, they're just random thoughts crashing together and your brain interpreting them in funny ways. Sometimes there's a pattern, and sometimes that pattern is just "You happened to see Donald Trump's picture for all of 0.1 seconds and had a little action with your boyfriend the day before."
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Comments (107)
MrGibbs25 20
I haven't stopped laughing either .
saffy66 34
YDI - for telling your boyfriend about it. He's not going to let you forget this, OP!
sophiaamadera 7
I'm so sorry that had to happen to you
Kittyphysics 21
your subconscious is a dick, op. it happens to all of us.
Pootispencerhere 1
I'm gettin' YUUUUUUUGE! (But seriously, that sucks. I thought MY nightmares were bad!)
russfml 31
It's the mop head isn't it? The chicks always love the mop heads lol
Nollan620 4
That's a nightmare
LaurieJuspeczyk 7
Hey, OP here! I can't believe this made it to the website. And I don't know how to use this website and account yet. Anyways, I made this account to let you know this made my day (or not, my BF keeps cracking up laughing or imitates him every time he remembers it). So, I wasn't wasted, drunk, or whatever. I've been having heavy days at the place I work at. I'm a Graphic Designer and the CEO has been acting like a real dick to my team lately and telling us why The Donald would be such a "Great" President, so prolly that's where the ******-up dream originated from. It's already bad enough to have Trump in the TV and other media (why no one thinks about the children?).
jackalex 7
Kill yourself for even dreaming that.
macbeth12 8
I literally recoiled away from my phone in disgust. I feel bad for you, op.