Today, I discovered that if you heckle a mime, it's possible that the mime will actually kick your ass. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
Today, I learned that if you make fun of a man for walking with a cane, you'd better be ready for him to hit you with it. FML
Today, I learned that kicking an armed mugger's ass is something that only happens in movies, and that brass knuckles are really fucking painful. FML
Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML
Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML
Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML
Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML
Today, I was kicked out of a comedy club for laughing too loudly. FML
Today, I learned how to wolf-whistle properly, and then learned what it feels like to be slapped on the head. FML
Today, I was really bored and decided to annoy my mom while she was doing the dishes. I walked up behind her, touched her shoulder, and said "Poke". She then donkey kicks me straight in the nuts saying "Kick". I know now to never bug my mom when she's in a bad mood. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
junkman6 22
If I could, I would high five that mime.
countryb_cth 38
And what did we learn here today? Hmmm.. Oh that's right, don't be an asshole
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (71)
pjsr 33
I'm speechless!
PennyLane27 32
I'm picturing an old silent film.... With a mime kicking a guy's ass.... And in the next scene, the mime is walking away with ladies swooning over him....and OP is left sobbing with a black eye and missing teeth :)
tayymeds 23
That truly would be a good picture. I enjoyed it almost as much as the mime probably enjoyed teaching OP a lesson about being a douche.
louisgriffin 8
At least he didn't push you down those damn stairs.
Mr_Saikaly 35
He would have deserved it for sure
TheSithAssassin 15
I'm very glad you learned that. I hope it was a hard lesson. Don't be a dick.
ckerane 16
go mime!
rocker_chick23 27
The mime is my hero. Douchebags like you deserve everything you get, and don't get any sympathy from me.
prettyinpinkxoxo 9
Shouldn't really be bothering someone like that..YDI
rocker_chick23 27
You actually think we are going to feel sorry for you? You deserved it for being a bully.
LennyComa 39
Good on the Mime. Now next time don't be a dick and just walk on by
engineerosaurus 26
Don't hold your breath.
engineerosaurus 26
It restores my faith in humanity a tiny bit that people are voting YDI by a 3-1 margin.