Today, my 33-year-old brother told my 10-year-old daughter that clouds are made by factories blowing smoke. My daughter laughed at him and he got upset. He still believed my dad's lie from 25 years ago. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 24-year-old brother tried to convince me that Hogwarts is real, because there is no way a person could have written that based on imagination. My parents agreed with him. FML
Today, I finally confronted my daughter about never using air freshener after she poops. She said, "But I thought flushing made the smell go away!" She's 15 and she actually believed this. FML
Today, my brother told my 3 year-old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML
Today, my mom grounded me for smoking cigarettes. I'm 13. I don't smoke. She said she smelled it on my clothes. I laughed and said I was in the basement, and used one of my dad's cig's to simulate a house on fire on my train layout. She didn't believe me. Honestly, I wouldn't believe that story either. FML
Today, I finally told my brother that I was being sexually harassed at work. I'm 22 and my brother is 41, and he literally told me that I don't even know what sexual harassment is, and then laughed in my face. FML
Today, my 17 year-old brother asked me if I used birth control. When I told him I did, he responded, "Isn't that like using an inhalor when you don't have asthma?" FML
Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML
Today, I had to convince my dad that text lingo causes brain damage just to try to get him to stop. He actually believed me, and is telling everyone they have, or will receive brain damage soon. FML
Today, I reprimanded my daughter for eating too many chips, since it's not good for you. She responded with, "Know what else isn't good for you? Two cigarettes a day." I couldn't even come up with a retort. I can't believe I just got burned by a ten-year-old. FML
Today, I confronted my dad about his horrible attitude toward women. I pointed out that a man with as many sisters and daughters as he has, shouldn’t refer to women who’ve had children as “damaged goods”. He laughed and said, “Ah well, once it’s been blown out, it’s no good to anyone.” Thanks dad. FML
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Top comments
WCARlover 35
What kind of person would think that clouds are smoke?! They're clearly little bits of unflavored cotton candy.
mcruff 12
I definitely knew what made clouds by the time i was 8...
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Comments (20)
WCARlover 35
What kind of person would think that clouds are smoke?! They're clearly little bits of unflavored cotton candy.
Magnoxidans 19
Wow sounds like you shouldn't have him teaching your daughter anything about the real world if he believed that as an adult..!
mcruff 12
I definitely knew what made clouds by the time i was 8...
RodzillaX 30
That's what happens when your head is in the clouds.
swervelol 28
My grandpa tried to tell me when I was little that the factories produced steam not clouds and I sassily replied "grandpa, look outside, what do you see? CLOUDS. It's a cloud factory." They still bring it up so I definitely feel for him
Chemystery 0
Just be glad your daughter didn't inherit the dumb gene
rodfergie 18
That's a whole lot of scary. He's 33 and believed that? How does he function in the real world?
Soninuva 41
It's not that surprising, actually. When children are young, they expect their parents to know everything, and be honest about serious matters. The problem is that they sometimes can't tell when adults are joking, or messing with them, and take it to heart. If they never hear otherwise, or find reason to challenge that belief, it's not surprising for them to carry it well into adulthood.
alternative-facts 6
How do you know the grandfather was messing with the brother? Maybe HE didn't know what clouds are made of either. Which is pretty darn pathetic. Clouds are not that complicated--easier than explaining why the sky is blue.
Gaernem 17
Sounds a lot like the myth of Gods and religion. Jammed into kids when they're young and cannot tell any better.
alternative-facts 6
Do your brother a favor--introduce him to Google.
bridgewalski 3
umm...if you made it past 6th grade you could identify certain cloud types and why they form...did he pass 2nd grade?
ImZakki 15
Why didn't he learn about the water cycle as a child?