Today, my mom grounded me for smoking cigarettes. I'm 13. I don't smoke. She said she smelled it on my clothes. I laughed and said I was in the basement, and used one of my dad's cig's to simulate a house on fire on my train layout. She didn't believe me. Honestly, I wouldn't believe that story either. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom accused me of smoking weed. Truth is, I'd just ripped the quietest and weirdest smelling fart of my life. She wouldn't believe me, accused me of making stupid excuses up, and grounded me. FML
Today, in a fit of jealousy over my recent muscle growth, my brother told our mom that I've only been going to the gym so I could smoke weed with my friends. She believed him and grounded me. FML
Today, I got suspended from school for smoking in the stairs. I'm grounded for a month without my phone, TV or any type of social connection. All of this would seem like a fair enough punishment if I actually smoked, but instead I just smell like my parent's second-hand smoke. FML
Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML
Today, my dad thought it would be funny to make me hold an unlit cigarette before FaceTiming my mom so he could prank her by saying, "He's got a new habit." My mom did not find it funny, especially when I mentioned to her that I did not willingly participate. Now I'm stuck in this car, listening to them argue. FML
Today, my mom found my weed stash and went berserk, grounding me and saying she's going to have my bedroom door removed. Less than an hour later, I found her laughing and smoking the same stash with my dad in the backyard. FML
Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML
Today, I tried to blackmail my dad by threatening to tell mom about the bong and weed he keeps hidden in the garage. Turns out she already knew about it and neither of them give a shit. Now I'm grounded until the new year. FML
Today, my mom found a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. She hates smoking, so she tore every single cigarette to pieces, then emptied a bag of kitty litter on them. On my bed. FML
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Top comments
Charlie Given 28
yeah using a cigarette wasn't the best idea and they're a fire hazard, you can actually buy miniature smoke generators for train sets, but otherwise don't let this discourage you from model trainsets they're are alot of fun .
lukey101 26
When I was 13 I used to smoke my parent's cigarettes backwards, as in I would light the orange end lol. To me it made perfect sense, the orange end represented fire
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Comments (4)
lukey101 26
When I was 13 I used to smoke my parent's cigarettes backwards, as in I would light the orange end lol. To me it made perfect sense, the orange end represented fire
bleachedraven 14
that's kind of cute lol
Charlie Given 28
yeah using a cigarette wasn't the best idea and they're a fire hazard, you can actually buy miniature smoke generators for train sets, but otherwise don't let this discourage you from model trainsets they're are alot of fun .
2deployments1divorce 11
Aren't modern cigarettes filled with so many flame retardant chemicals that you have to puff them to light them?
jkjorn 18
I've heard the opposite- that they put chemicals in them to keep them burning even if you set them down, so you have to buy more if you're forgetful. But I've never smoked so I don't know how true that is.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Would have been more believable if you'd said you walked by someone else who was smoking and the smell got into your clothes. I've had it happen to me, and it's infuriating.